LOVE IN A PHOTOGRAPH

Chapter 23

I don't know how to recover back then but I told myself that... what happened that day is not a reason for me to give up, there's my life waiting for me outside the world of love. Napagtanto ko na hindi lang umiikot ang mundo ko sa pag-ibig, na hindi ko lang dapat pinagtutuunan ng pansin ang puso ko dahil sa mga darating na araw ay maghihilom at maghihilom din iyon.

After what happened at the party, Keesha took me home and I was so surprised that time because my friends came all the way from Baguio to comfort me, they knew what happened, it was spread widely at social media and newspapers, they held the event privately but the media intrigued right after

The next days were a bit tough for me, I lost my appetite, I'm just locking myself inside my room, I don't know how to stand and be strong again. My mom encouraged me to stand up again, I remember her saying...

" You were more before you met him so you loose nothing when he left ."

It hurts when you realize you were that easy to let go, that even you pleaded it's not enough to make him stay. It hurts so bad every time I remember it, I still get sad about what happened. Every now and then it just hits me, sometimes, it takes days for me to get over it .

I never thought that a single moment or let say... memories could be stuck in a picture. One click of the camera and you have taken a single moment, hundreds and thousands of clicks and you have taken a lot of memories... but then from that past few days I realize that because it's just a picture, the memory itself is not moving... it stopped and freeze, like what we had... what we felt and shared is inside those pictures... not moving

I never knew that memories could be just photographs taken from the past where we were still creating memories and a way to look back at it is to take a picture and treasure it, but in our case...

We stopped clicking the camera and those memories that we have taken stopped and never continued, and just like a click, in one shot, our love ended

" Bakit ba ang mga pinalit mo pa diyan sa pader eh tungkol pa rin sa photography? ." I get rid all of those pictures and kept it in a box... somehow deep inside a tiny bit of care is still there, I didn't really get rid of them and throw it... I just kept it

" Mahal ko ang photography Joy, huwag ka nang umangal ." tinitigan ko ang mga nakasabit na black and white frames sa harapan, I ordered it last week, ayoko namang maging blanko ang buong pader ko kaya nagisip ako ng paraan para mapalitan kung ano ang mga natanggal doon

" Yung mga picture frame sa labas palitan mo naman ng mga mukha natin, naiirita ako sa pagmumukha ng isa doon, iyong mukha mo lang ang maaliwalas ." wala pa akong ganang tumawa... I forget how to smile and laugh without a little bit of fake on it

" Ikaw pala ang naiinis eh di ikaw ang mag-alis ." lumapit ako sa isang naisabit at inayos iyon para pantay

" Ikaw ang hiniwalayan kaya ikaw ang mag-alis ." parang kailan lang nang halos buhatin niya ako nang dumating akong naglulupasay at umiiyak tapos ngayon nakita lang akong nakakarecover na... anlakas ng mangasar