oh, anna [-hs]

american shoes

a/n Brace. Yourself.

19.

Today is long.

When I wake up, my hair feels dry from the chlorine. I wander the house, but Harry's gone again. I appreciate that he is. I'm not sure if he's leaving because he knows I feel strange about waking up with people in the morning, but even if it isn't on purpose, I'm glad he's not here. Although I have to say, I feel different about it here. There's something about L.A. that's freeing.

I use his shower, bringing my own shampoo and conditioner with me this time. There's still a guitar on the floor of his room, it's moved to the other side of his bed though.

I make myself breakfast. There's no note on the fridge this time. I wonder if it's because of last night, I wonder how he feels, if he even remembers, or if it was just in my head. Thinking back to it now, the lines blur. I can barely tell if it was reality or not. The only thing that confirms the moment, is that I woke up in bed this morning, which means I walked back into the house with him last night, which means the memory I have must be what happened.

I leave him a note, written in notebook paper on the kitchen counter.

Big day today. Won't be back until late tonight. -Q

I'm not sure how it happened, but I've been signing my name like he does recently.

I collect my things and leave the house, driving in the yellow car to the location for filming. Which goes off without a hitch. Simon isn't here, which means I get to be a little more creative with framing and composition. I get some backup, boring footage too, just in case he doesn't like some of it. Louis seems to really enjoy himself though. After I get a good shot, I call him over to look at it, and he gets so excited every time. "You're brilliant!" He tells me, several times. I grin.

When we break for lunch, I drive down to Blue Diner to meet Charlotte. We talk about her new song, "Disarray," and she lets me listen to the demo. It's good, has a great rhythm to it. We talk about a music video, and she tells me she really wants to do a one shot. I give her the names of a few choreographers I've worked with in the past to check out. Some of them I graduated college with. She seems grateful, nervous, but insanely excited as well. Then I have to duck out, get back to set.

The second half of the day is spent filming the remainder of the interior scenes. And when it finally gets dark enough, we move outside. The sun's setting to dusk and we take the remote crew up onto the roof to film the opening sequence.

"Alright," I start, turning on my director's voice. "So this is the first shot. It's quiet, we'll filter in sounds from the city. Just kind of, walk out onto the roof, like you've just spent the whole night out and now it's morning. And you're thinking about this person, you're just now realizing the night was missing something," I inspire him a little. He coughs lightly, shoves his hands into his pockets and nods, looking out at the disappearing sun. I walk back behind the camera and nod at everyone. "And action," I call out.

The camera follows him as he wanders the roof, looking out at the "morning" in front of him. He looks somber, sad even. It's perfect, it feels a little too real. He stares at the sunset, his face unchanging, blank. And then his mouth opens slightly and he rubs the back of his neck, staring at the sky. I hold the camera on him a little longer, and then lift my hand up to signal the end of the shot.