Palindrome

Thirty

Chapter 30

My throat hurts.

Surprise!

Last night, I walked out of the room with my head held high as if nothing had happened. My parents were in their room. A plate of food left for me on the table. Seeing it sent a wave of nausea through me. I managed to scoff it down despite the contracting pain I felt while swallowing.

So I guess I'm alive.

Yay.

But I suppose, it's a good thing I made it to today. Giselle needs someone on that stage, and as good of a replacement Bronwyn is- I'm not backing out. Besides, there's another reason why I hope today isn't as shitty as the other days.

It's Paxton Enjelical's birthday.

And I didn't stay up till three planning something for nothing. Granted this still sounds like a really bad gift in my head. Then again, nothing ever sounds good in my head these days.

Ma and Papa have already left today. I haven't spoken to any of them. Ma dropped me a text about breakfast and that's pretty much it. So I guess we're playing some sort of charade, hide and seek game between each other. Who knows if they'll show up to today's concert. The thought feels like a rock thrown to my face.

Today's the day not for that.

Since I'm late, I grab a granola bar for breakfast that I'm bound to pass on to Nagi. Slipping on my converse, I throw my jacket on and make sure the front door's locked. When I'm walking back I end up passing the study where I catch a glimpse of the mandir. I stand at the door; you're not supposed to enter with your shoes on. Despite everything, I'm not going against that rule.

I don't know if I believe in God anymore.

Neither do I believe in myself.

"There's someone else that I believe in," I say loudly so that my voice bounces off the walls of the study.

And I can't keep him waiting long. So on that note, I turn on the security system and run out of the garage door with my bag and ukulele. Dumping the two in the backseat, I slide into the front seat and back out of the garage, pulling up to Paxton's front door.

He's already waiting today, and I nearly slam the brakes when I see what he's dressed in. Unlike his usual basic attire of jeans, he's wearing a literal suit with his blazer slung casually over his shoulder.

Remind me again if it's his birthday or mine?

I honk once, startling him as he looks up from his phone and grins wildly. He opens the door, and I swear my heart's doing this disgusting little dance as I drink him in. Paxton didn't bother taming his hair, so it's that messy mop that it is every day. He leans a hand on his cheek leaning in towards me with a smile on his face. The cheeky bastard's infiltrating my personal space and turning my own strategy against me.

"Morning," he greets.

Words die on the tip of my tongue; I nod once clearing my throat before I can speak. It's his birthday, I should wish him happy birthday. Be remotely nice for once. Instead-

"It's freezing outside, and you choose to wear that," I say pointing accusingly at his outfit.

Paxton blinks dubiously, "It's show day, Nagi told me it's tradition to dress up. Is it too much?"

"Yeah it's way too much," I say nodding along. His face morphs into something of panic and he's toying with the analog watch on his wrist now.

"Should I go change?" he asks nervously.