Love You Like The Movies

Chapter 3

Her chance came one day when she found Hyo Seop reading a script alone in one of Doldam's offices. She noticed he was sitting down on the sofa and was bouncing his leg nervously looking troubled. She made some tea she found on the countertop for both of them and she then slowly sat down beside him and offered him the cup.

"Oh hello noona." He said surprise was evident on his face when he finally saw her.

"Are you alright?" She asked taking a sip from her cup.

"Yes l'm fine." He quickly answered giving her a half hearted smile. 

Sung Kyung raised an eyebrow at him telling him without words that she knew she he was lying.

He opened and closed his mouth a few times and Sung Kyung waited for him patiently to say whatever it was on his mind.

"I'm scared shitless." He finally said.

"Scared of what?" She asked.

"Making a damn fool of myself in front of Han Suk Kyu sunbaenim. What if I make NGs so many times? This is already a hard scene and I don't want to fuck it up. I knew accepting this role was really not a good idea."

Sung Kyung noticed how genuinely stressed he was and it just made her appreciate him and his love for his craft a bit more. She also realized that he just didn't seem to grasp just how talented he was.

She didn't want to discount his feelings though by giving him false assurances because she knew what it  felt like to be looked down and to create high expectations for yourself.

She told him a story instead.

"The first time I got an acting part I was so elated. I was so sure it would be a breeze as I had practiced really hard for it. I was thinking finally I could show the world how talented I can be. But then as you know in our line of work social media is both our best friend and greatest enemy. The day of the shooting it turned out to be the latter. I opened my laptop to update my social media account despite my manager warning me not to. You see our brilliant brain is designed to retain the negativity easily instead and so all I remember that day were the nasty comments of how on earth did I manage to get into acting when all I knew was to strut the runway and look pretty. That the show is going suck with having a cast like me." She took a deep breath as some lingering heaviness still affected her sometimes then she continued, "Those thoughts stayed in my head even when  the shooting has started. Before I could even say my lines I vomited all over my co star's shoes. I was so embarrassed that I ended up dropping out from that show."  She remembered that truly was one of the worst days in her acting career. She almost forgot that she was talking to Hyo Seop who was listening raptly at her with an unbelievable look in his face.

She chuckled. "Yes Hyo Seop Shi, that happened to me and I'm still here aren't? Doubting yourself is normal but giving up is the problem.  I realize then that the world won't stop to scrutinize me. I just had to learn to stop it from dictating me and to not let fear consume me or I wouldn't be here if I had let it. Use those instead to fuel you to fight. You are here because you know you want to be here and even if you don't believe in yourself now, then believe those who does because it means they saw something special and great in you. You just have to learn to accept that yourself."

Hyo Seop just nodded still speechless and looked incredulous about what he just heard.

Then she remembered something. "Oh and one more thing, something an uncle had taught me. Follow me okay?"

Hyo Seop nodded again. She sat up straight and he followed suit.

"If you feel like panicking take a deep. Gather the air inside you mouth until your cheeks puffed. It's going to calm you down. Just like this." Sung Kyung closed her eyes and proceeded to inhale and puffed her cheeks and slowly exhaled. She then opened her eyes to see Hyo Seop whose  eyes were closed too, still with puffed cheeks and was turning red. She burst out laughing and Hyo Seop opened one of his eyes to look at her.

He suddenly exhaled and cried "Hey! Was that a joke?"

Sung Kyung stopped laughing. "It wasn't! But you were supposed to let the air out you know that right? You were turning red and I don't think I could carry you if you passed out!"

He chuckled too and picked up the cup of tea she gave him. He took a sip and then looked at her with a genuine smile on his face. "Thank you noona." And she knew he was thanking her for more than just the tea.

Moreover he nailed the scene with Han Suk Kyu and then some. She was so proud.