Toujours Pur: Prisoner of Fear

Whirlwind of Waterworks

Confusion, anger, sadness, fear, shock, disappointment, and relief were all emotions swirling inside me. I don't even know what to do, where to go, what to feel. It felt like there was a war raging inside me. I stumbled away from the Hospital Wing, barely noticing Parkinson slipping in after I left.

I blindly stumbled around the halls trying to find something. Something that would take away all these feeling and make everything make sense again. Is there a mythical device that can tell you what to do, what to feel, what's right and wrong? If so I call dibs on the first try.

I found myself in front of a portrait of a bowl of fruit. I don't know why I keep coming here when I'm upset, but at least I can get some chocolate out it. I tickled the pear to open the portrait and made my way in. Sitting on the couch I ordered something from a House-elf. I didn't even remember what I ordered. Tootie, the house-elf had cleaned up my hand and the blood on me.

A few minutes later Tootsie came striding over with a hot chocolate and a dark chocolate croissant. I thanked her and set the food down. I gingerly sipped the beverage and curled myself into a ball on the sofa. I wasn't hungry and didn't think I would be for some time. Just at that moment the portrait swung open and Cedric came running in.

He spotted me and sat down by me. "How did you know I was here?" I asked him numbly.

"It's the talk of the school Gemma, everyone is saying how you jumped in front of Malfoy to protect him from a rogue Hippogriff. He's seriously injured in the Hospital wing and you wouldn't leave his side." He huffed out, he was breathing heavily, probably from running down all those stairs. "I know this may be a daft question, but are you alright?"

I shrugged my shoulders and looked away from him, "I don't know. I don't know how to feel or think."

A harsh laugh ripped from my mouth. "I mean he disowned me. His own twin!" I slammed my mug down on the table and the liquid sloshed around. "Why? Because I was sorted into a stupid house? 11 years of family, of love thrown down the drain because of a stupid ancient hat that gets to decide our future. He left me! He never stuck up for me! He never ONCE tried to talk to me. To even see if I was living on the streets or safe. He was my family and he abandoned me!"

All the anger drained my face and I felt completely drained. "Why can't I do the same? Why can't I ever stop thinking about them, or worrying about them? Why do I throw my life on the line to save him when he wouldn't do the same for me? Why doesn't my family love me?" T

ears started spilling out and Cedric immediately pulled me into a hug. I wrapped my hand around his jumper and cried into his chest. He whispered encouraging words to me and eventually I was able to calm down and stop crying.

I wiped my eyes and accepted a tissue Tootsie brought me. "I can't fathom to understand why anyone would disown someone as kind, smart, and genuine as you. All I know is that it is their loss. They never saw you for the real you. They might not be there for you, but I am. Your friends are, your Aunt and Uncle are. We are all here for you and will continue to stand by you no matter what. We love you Gemma and you are worth more to us than you realize." He smiled at me and smiled back at him before giving him a hug.

I felt all the emotions stop swirling. All I could feel was love and happiness. Cedric and I spent the next hours eating and laughing. I recounted what actually happened and how Malfoy's arrogance had actually hurt him. He was completely healed already.

After the story we quickly changed the subject to Peeve's latest tricks. Cedric told me about Hogsmeade and promised we would meet in the three broomsticks for a butterbeer.

I knew that I had missed charms but I am sure Professor Flitwick would understand. Cedric and I grabbed a handful of snacks from the house-elves and we made our way to the library where we sat at our usual table. I was near the back of library, in the quietest place. It had a view that overlooked the lake. He started his homework and I started working even more ahead. I decided to work on charms since that is what I had missed today.