Drink Your Medicine (Jalex)

<15>

"So Helen tells me that you kissed someone? " My Mum asked during dinner. I choked on my water. 

In a coughing fit, I managed only to shout out a distorted: "WHAT?! " 

Helen shrugged. "It's a slow news day. " 

Never in my life have I ever wanted to put a bullet in her more. "I didn't, " I began the lie. 

"Oh, yes you did. You had that look in your eye. That awestruck look. " 

Shut up! "Well... " Forgive me, Maria. "We were playing truth or dare during lunch. And, " forgive me Zack and Rian, "Rian dared me to kiss Maria. So I did. " 

Helen opened her mouth to contradict me once more, but I gave her a death stare and she shut her mouth. 

"Was she good? " My dad asked. 

"Dad! " I wailed. 

"I'm just asking! " He said, raising his hands in defense. 

"For God's sake, it was only a quick kiss. We didn't make out or anything, " I assured them. I twiddled my thumbs under the table as I mentally prepared myself to ask the one question that I'd been dreading asking ever since Jack kissed me. What if we could be more than friends? "But, that does bring me to my next point." 

"Which would be what? " My mum asked. 

"What if I wasn't strictly heterosexual? " 

Jillian dropped her silverware on her plate, and everyone proceeded to stare at me. "You mean, like, homosexual? " She asked. 

"No. Just maybe not only girls. " I looked down. If they disapprove, I don't think that it'll matter to me. But I just think that it'll change my mind about where to be around Jack. 

My dad snorted. "Sure, Alex. You can date a guy. I'd give the two of you three weeks before you figured out that you're definitely straight. "

"And if I'm not?" It's not a phase, Dad. Don't be one of those people. 

"We'll cross that bridge when we get to it." He waved his hand dismissively. 

I'll consider taking that. Maybe if I can manage to get Jack out of that mirror.....

Right, friends first. Friends first. Relax. The remainder of dinner was eaten silently. I felt awkward. Even when I was spoken to, I was never really the center of attention. This feels weird. I quickly dropped my plate into the sink and ran upstairs to get my phone. I would talk to Jack in person tonight when everyone else was asleep. Right now, there was too much attention on me. 

Me: We need to talk

I put my phone down and got to work on my homework while I waited for the response. I had been procrastinating on it ever since I went into the mirror earlier. This was in fact the first day in weeks that I hadn't done most of my homework before dinner. Despite the assignments being simple, I found it difficult to focus. I continued to glance at my phone for notifications every so often, but was disappointed when I received no response. 

After about three hours, I had all of my homework done. My phone finally went off with a message from Jack. It was by far the longest text message that I'd ever received. 

Jack: I wanted to think this through very well before I said anything stupid. So I spent a long time writing and rewriting it. Sorry if that worried you, I just didn't want to give you impulsive information. First things first, you probably want to talk about that kiss. I know that it's been haunting you from the moment you told Helen on accident. Yes, I do know about that. What did you do to play it off by the way? Regardless, that was impulsive. I didn't know how to control the feeling in my gut. I wanted to kiss you so badly. I wanted to kiss you since the day that we touched hands against the glass. I know that it's wrong, we're only friends. That's probably all you thought that we'd ever be. And honestly, I'm perfectly okay with that. But I think that I'm developing feelings beyond friendship for you. If that makes you uncomfortable, I'm really sorry. I hope that we can ignore it if you don't feel the same. That being said, you're conviction to get me out of this mirror is also haunting me. It's my punishment, and if I get out, then I think that'll be like letting go. In case you haven't noticed, I'm not very good at letting go of anything. It can often be misread as clinginess, but I also hope that I'm not annoying you by letting my past demons haunt me. If that does, I apologize for that as well. I also have to say that I think that I am in fact, ready to leave the mirror as soon as you can possibly get me out. I just hope that you've arranged the living situation. I don't really want to have to go back into the mirror once I'm out. Before you ask, no, I can't be reunited with my family. That just won't do for me. They won't take me back. Please don't send me a message saying that makes you feel bad. I really don't want any pity at the moment. Regardless, I think that I've said enough about anything and everything for now. I suppose that you can get back to me whenever possible. 

I fell back onto my bed after reading it. He had feelings for me. Do I have feelings for him? What do I feel for him? What do I see him as? All of the questions swam around my head. I don't know how to respond to his message. I guess I could start by answering the message's only question. 

Me: To respond only to the question, I told them about some people that I met today. They were friendly, so I said that the kiss was with a girl on a dare. If that bothers you, know that I said it more for fear of homophobia than out of embarrassment. 

Jack: I understand

Me: I don't know how I feel about you. You liking me doesn't bother me, but I really don't know my own feelings

Jack: If I took you out tomorrow, would that help?

Me: You're asking me out?

Jack: I think so. 

What could possibly go wrong there?

Me: I think that I might help. So, yes. That'll work for me. Now let me check the house to make sure that no one else is around. I'm breaking you out of that damn mirror once and for all.