A King with No Title

Days we would rather forget

Arthur had not been the same since Guinevere's passing, he was consumed by despair and guilt. All he could think was that he had done nothing but fail, failed not only her but his children too. How could he explain that their Mother was permanently gone, and that he hadn’t really spent time with her when she would have needed him most? He couldn't help but let these thoughts consume his mind, and he soon became numb to all feelings other than the guilt and pain.

Merlin tried all that he could to bring Arthur out of the depths of his mind that lied to him and told him he failed Gwen. She would have never wished this pain to befall Arthur, she never held anything against Arthur for she knew he was not the same man after that day on the battlefield; he had not lost his honour or strength, instead he had gained something… For in those moments before what he thought to be his death, he realised he had not done everything he had wished or lived the life he had once envisioned. He loved Guinevere, but he was not in love with her. He knew then his heart belonged to someone else. Near death experiences reveal what is the soul’s true desire.

Arthur only really found happiness in his children, even when they cried, he didn't mind. He would do what he could to remove their sadness. In the eyes of his children was the reflection of their mother's kindness and joy, a thing Arthur found great comfort in. Gwen was never really gone because her children would embody her spirit. Merlin would help Arthur with them a lot and taught them all kinds of weird and wonderful things. Merlin in turn became a further source of true happiness.

Much of the kingdom had mourned alongside the King, many paying respects in leaving wildflowers around their homes, as they often saw Gwen in the fields picking these when she had been Morgana's servant. For weeks, walking through Camelot was a sight to behold, as the flowers hung around each doorway; dog roses, oxeye daisies, primroses, honeysuckle, foxgloves, sweet violets and cows parsley to fill the gaps. An incredible visage of purple and white. A pure and beautiful symbol of Camelot's love for their young Queen, lost to them too soon.

As the children got older, they loved to enter Camelot with their Father, it was the only time the King was really seen out of the walls of the castle. Raine was a favorite of all the maids and serving girls, she had a natural charisma and had the ability to make anyone smile when she did. Elyan was strong but timid, often shying from the spotlight, he liked to play fight with Arthur and learn new things. He would often sit with Merlin as he polished armour and weapons, as Merlin would leave him enthralled by a different story each time he sat with him.

Arthur had to admit he did like the questions Elyan would ask whenever he came back from his talks with Merlin, launching himself into Arthur's chambers in an excited run as he asked about the magical beings and their battles. It was almost as if he was fact checking everything Merlin said.

Raine would go to Merlin when he was with Gaius and look at all the drafts Gaius would make while asking Merlin about Gwen. She was often told how much she looked like her Mother, her dark locks of hair and the gleam in her eyes, the red dress she was so fond of, meant that there was never any question to why people said this. She would also accompany Merlin to collect herbs for Gaius when she could, always picking up wildflowers on her way. Arthur wasn't always pleased when she did this but her beautiful happy smile when she would come back meant he would never stop her.

The flowers that had been put up in honour of the Queen after her passing became an annual event, and every year without failure Arthur and the children would go through Camelot and look at the city decorated in the stunning flowers. Raine would always come home with a new crown of flowers that she would wear everyday she could until the flowers were all wilted. Elyan would often come home with a cape decorated with wildflowers too, they never left empty handed.

It was during one of these walks through the city when Arthur was confronted by a fairly young man. As precaution, Gwaine, Percival and Leon always accompanied them and put themselves in way of the King and the angry stranger. "Raine. Elyan. Go and find Merlin." Arthur says and they run at full speed, hand in hand, back to the Castle. It didn't take them long to find Merlin as he was in the courtyard tending to a horse.

"Merlin." They both yell as he comes into sight, which made him turn immediately, as it's rather unexpected; he had thought they wouldn't be back until the sun was setting, as they often were on this outing.

He starts toward them, "What's wrong, you two?" He asks as they draw to a halt in front of him.
"Dad sent us to find you." Elyan breathed out, clearly out of breath from running. "Some man was yelling at dad when we left." He says looking at Raine and letting go of her hand.
Merlin looked up from them and made his way to the arch they had come through with them both closely trailing behind him. "I'm sure he'll be back soon." Merlin said his voice shaking slightly, he couldn't help but feel that something was truly wrong with this situation. "Come on you can sit with me while we wait." He says putting out his hand which Raine takes and Elyan grabs her sleeve. He sits them on nearby steps and goes back to the horse. He didn't really have to do this, but he was bored and had nothing else to do yet again, which was incredibly rare. Even Gaius couldn't give him any chores, so he decided he'd help the stable hand.

It was a long while before Arthur returned to the castle after the confrontation, Merlin had made sure that the children had food and were comfortable before going to find him, ensuring that return did in fact happen. It didn't take him long once he was in the city to find him, for he was surrounded by guards and there was a large argument being had. "Sire." Merlin says from a few feet away, which immediately drew his attention, "You're urgently needed back at the Castle." He states.

"Of course." He replied, "You must leave Camelot and not return, we do not want anyone who can disturbing the peace we have achieved, if you return to Camelot you will be imprisoned." Arthur says in a loud voice before turning and walking towards Merlin. Merlin could not see the others involved in this confrontation but decided that he shouldn't question it.

"Arthur Pendragon, you will regret the day you turned your back on us." Someone yells from the crowd, but Arthur continues to walk away. Nothing but idle threats in his mind. He knew Merlin was watching them anyway.

"Merlin, where are Raine and Elyan?" Arthur asks his mood suddenly dropping and anger present in his tone.

"In their room playing Sire." Arthur hits him gently upside the head, but Merlin still flinched like it had hurt, "What was that for?" Merlin asks, trying his best not to retaliate due to the fact publicly hitting the King would potentially result in a large amount of backlash. Had they been in the castle Merlin may have fought back due to his ever-growing confidence around Arthur.

Arthur smirks while giving Merlin a side glance, "If I send my children to you, I expect you to stay with them and protect them." He says and shakes his head as Merlin throws his hand up in the air.

"Well then I'd be abandoning another child, you're always getting yourself in trouble when I'm not around." Merlin pauses and smiles as Arthur gives him a questioning look, "I mean you weren't even away for two hours and you had to send Raine and Elyan back because you were in an argument." Merlin laughs as Arthur rolls his eyes and hits him again.

"If you compare me to a child again Merlin, I will have you burnt." Arthur laughs, even though there was a hint of seriousness behind his words. Merlin tightens his lips and nods looking away, before laughing.

"Understood, your royal dollophead." Merlin does a small bow only to be pushed over by Arthur as they reached the courtyard. "That was a very underhanded move." Merlin yells as Arthur walks off and into the Castle.

Merlin ran to catch up with Arthur, after brushing the dirt off himself. Arthur didn't bother speeding up to avoid Merlin but instead just ignored him until he got to Raine and Elyan's room. As the door was opened Raine ran to Arthur, grabbing him in a strong embrace, her little arms unable to wrap around him fully. He picks her up and carries her to one of the seats at a table where Elyan was sat.
"Are you both feeling alright?" He asks as Merlin leans in the doorway watching Arthur soften his expression, the worry and pain of being King leaving him, for these few moments he was nothing but a father. They both nod and start to talk about what they had been doing while he had been away, well Raine did anyway. Elyan could barely get a word in edgeways.

Elyan didn't mind though, he was always content listening to his sister's excitement. Hearing her be happy made him feel the same way, she was always very sociable and kind, something he didn't totally understand but it made her happy instead of angry so he didn't mind.
Merlin left the room to go to his Chambers, he was done for the day, and he wanted to sleep. He hadn't realised it but he was exhausted from worry, subconsciously he was incredibly worried about Arthur, seeing Raine and Elyan run back without him. His mind feared the worst, having him be safe had meant the world to him.

He removed himself from the room as Arthur talked to his children. As he walked down the steps, he looked over Camelot, the wind had picked up meaning that petals were flying in a disorderly fashion, he couldn't help a smile gracing his lips. The city looked peaceful and beautiful as the purples, pinks and oranges of the sunset cast an amazing array of colour over it.
But something about this felt wrong. Merlin felt unnerved and unsettled, like something was about to happen. He wished he could have called on Kilgarrah but he knew he wouldn't be available. He had become too tired and Merlin had to journey to him, as his age prevented the other way around. Kilgarrah was close to his end but spent his final years teaching Aithusa, to speak and to learn. Aithusa needed all the help and support she could obtain, soon to be the last of her kind.

That night, Merlin lay in his bed, reading through a mound of books on spells, mainly healing. No matter how hard he tried these were the hardest of spells. He was able to do minor things but he couldn't do anything much further, he knew it would take many more years before he could. He knew that he had to learn though, because they could be the difference between someone surviving or dying – and with Arthur at risk constantly, never mind his heirs, he needed to be cautious.

When he lay there, he heard someone enter and talk to Gaius. It was late and almost pitch black. Gaius wouldn't be too calm with many people here this late, so it couldn't be anyone new. Even so, why would they come this late? Could this not wait until morning?

"Merlin?" Gaius yells, before hearing a large amount of glass being moved about and clinking, the echoes of it even louder at night, when there wasn't the bustle of people driving through some sound. Merlin closed his book and stood up, slightly annoyed he was going to sleep soon. Even though he wasn't asleep, yet he was going to be and that annoyed him.

He opened the door to see Arthur stood there, in the Cape that he had given him. The one he had used to blend with the commoners, and the one he was wearing the entire time he learnt that his pride was not always his greatest asset. "Come with me." He says as Merlin stands dumbfounded. As he glanced at Gaius, he just received a shrug and eye roll from him as response before he made his way to his bed.

"Yeah." Merlin said grabbing his jacket and running after Arthur as he left the room. As they reached the outer walls of the castle grounds, Merlin grabbed Arthur's arm and dragged him to face him. "What is this about?" Arthur rolls his eyes in response and puts his hand on the back of Merlin's neck.

"You used to be more fun. Where has your sense of adventure gone Merlin?" He smiles, as if that were enough of a response whilst turning and running further away. Merlin was once again dumbfounded, and it took him a few moments to catch up with what had just happened before running after him again.

He trailed behind him for a long while before reaching a parting of trees in the woods, where Arthur came to an abrupt stop. This led to a collision, in which they both ended up on the floor. They both fumbled a bit, mumbling apologies as they made their way to their feet again. Merlin thought Arthur was being such a cabbagehead.

When they were stood, Merlin noticed a lake, and Arthur staring at it with a small sadness in his eyes. "I need your advice Merlin, and I needed time out of Camelot, so here we are. There are some days I'd rather forget, but this is not one of them."