Around and around we go

Chapter 15

"Natalie. Open your eyes sweetheart. Come on." 
"MMmrrrpphhfff wha....? Mmmmm you smell like mmmmmmmm Coachella and....love...mmmmmmmmm." 

"Hahaha come on little one, think you can stand up?" 
I opened my eyes and looked up into those blue pools he gets away with for eyes. We were sitting on the floor, well he was sitting on the floor, I was kind of sprawled over him while he cradled me in his arms. 

"Euugghh did I seriously just faint?" I blushed furiously. I do this thing where I faint when I REALLY can't handle a situation. It's gotten better over the years, but it still happens, and it's SO embarrassing. 

"Yes, you did. Are you ok? Can I get you anything?" He sounded so worried and concerned.

"No. I'm alright. I just need a moment..." I took a deep breath and my nostrils were overcome with the sterile scent of what could only be a hospital. My brain was working in hyper-drive now. I sat straight up and took a look around the room, my eyes coming upon the bed just over Jared's shoulder. Shannon. 

"What the ACTUAL FUCK Jared?!" I was FURIOUS. I was up on my feet pulling Jared up by the collar of his shirt. "WHAT. DID. YOU. LET. HIM. DO.!?!?!" Hysterical. "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF EACH OTHER!!! LOOK AT HIM! FUCKING LOOK AT HIM!!!!!" I was dragging him by the front of his shirt over to his brother. 

"Nat. Please. Not here. Please, just stop yelling." He was the epitome of calm. Almost like he was expecting me to react this way. I was still fuming.

"Fine." I said through gritted teeth. 

"Could you, maybe, let me go?" He glanced down at my white knuckles clinging to his shirt. 

I released him and shoved him aside, striding over to the side of Shannon's bed.

"Nat...! What are you doing....?" Jared asked me apprehensively as I stood over his brother. OUR brother. The heartbreak and the past were forgotten the moment I saw the state he was in. He looked like hell. Hitting his head and mostly drowning would not have resulted in him looking this awful. Tears were starting to run down my cheeks as I stood over Shannon's emaciated body. I reached out and gently caressed his cheek, which was far too cool to the touch. I smoothed out his unruly eyebrow, silently willing him to open his eyes for me. 

I don't know how long I stood there, quiet tears rolling down my cheeks, while I tenderly held his frail hand praying that he would be alright. Finally the doctor came in. Jared came up behind me, took my hand from Shannon's and whispered in my ear "Come over here. Let's talk to the doctor." 

The doctor told us that he had suffered a fairly serious concussion and that he would make a full recovery but it would be slow. We just had to wait for him to wake up now. I noticed that he didn't say anything about his lifestyle choices, or whatever bullshit politically correct way people talk about addiction.

We thanked him, and when he shook my hand I made a very obvious wince at the pain in my wrist. 
"Are you hurt? May I take a look?" 
"I'm fine really, just clumsy." I tried pulling my hand back but Jared stepped up and held my arm, pulling my sleeve up to reveal that it had gotten much worse. He gave me a 'shut up and trust me' look and turned to the doctor. 
"She's lying.  She likes to pretend she's tough, but this doesn't look too good to me. What do you think?" 
"You're right, Mr. Leto, it doesn't look good at all. What level of pain are you in?"
"Hmmmm as long as I don't move, it's like a 4..." Jared made a small unimpressed snort noise. "but then it's about an 8, I guess, when I have to..OUCH!" The doctor had tried to rotate it gently around and I almost punched him in the throat. 
"Hmmmm let's go get an X-ray, just to be sure." He said with what I assumed was supposed to be a reassuring smile. It just made me want to run away. I turned to look at Jared, pleading with my eyes to not make me do this. 
"It'll be ok. I'll come with you. Shayla? Are you alright with staying here with Shannon?" She had left the room when I started screaming at Jared, she looked at me awkwardly as she came back into the room.