Around and around we go

Chapter 16

Broken.

My wrist was fucking broken.

In TWO fucking places.

Because why would I make it easy on myself? I knew being as clumsy as I am would eventually lead to a situation like this. I was just grateful that I didn't have to deal with it alone and had the one person I trusted most with me. 

They were discussing whether to reduce the fractures or not as they examined the films in front of me. 
"Jared...." I turned to him, desperate. He squeezed my hand reassuringly and cleared his throat to get their attention. 

"I'm sorry, is there any way to do this without any drugs or sedatives?"

"There is, but we definitely do not recommend it. May I ask why this is a concern?"

"She is.... she has... " He struggled for the words. 

"I'm a recovering addict. Prescription drugs- before you ask, all of them, whatever I could get my hands on-  and cocaine, lots of cocaine." 
I was looking directly at Jared as I said this and the way he returned my gaze broke my heart. It was a mixture of his own heartbreak, love, guilt, fear, sadness and concern. This was the first time I said this to him. It was the one thing in my entire life that I kept from him and never discussed. I could see that he wanted to say something but either couldn't find the right words or just couldn't bring himself to say them. I gave him a little nod, squeezed his hand and said "I know." 

He sighed, reaching up and pulling me in closer so he could kiss my forehead. I let him linger there for a moment before turning back to the Doctor. 
"What are my options?" 

..... 

I woke up from a dreamless sleep snuggled up to Jared's side. My head resting on his chest, I closed my eyes again and sighed. He was mindlessly stroking my hair and humming a tune I didn't recognize. It was beautiful. 

"Welcome back." He said softly. 

Burying my face in his shirt I mumbled "mmmicouldmaybestaylikethisforever." 

"What?" He chuckled at my groggy state. I looked up at him, one eye open. 

"I said: I could stay like this forever." 

He looked at me thoughtfully and smiled. "Me too. Just... somewhere nicer." 

Opening my other eye I looked a little closer at our surroundings. The stupid hospital. For a wonderful moment I completely forgot about the events of the morning. 
My wrist was in a cast now. They convinced me to take a light sedative, which they assured me was non-habit forming and they froze the area as best they could. So right now I was mostly numb and in less pain than I had been prior. 

"How are you feeling?" His voice full of concern. 

"Better. Numb. Sleepy. Hungry." 

He chuckled at me and I could feel him relax again. 
"Well, if you're feeling up to it, I should have enough time to take you to lunch. Then you can come back here and nap. How does that sound?" 

"Am I allowed to leave?" 

"Definitely. Sushi?"

"YES please!" 

"Alright, do you need help getting dressed again?" 

"Wha..?" I lifted the blanket and saw that I was in a hospital gown. "Eugh.. seriously? I broke my wrist... Did they have to stick me in one of these?" 

"Hahahaha! You don't remember? YOU didn't want them to ruin MY shirt, so you insisted on it!" 

"Shut up..What the fuck is wrong with me?... Come on and help me. I have no feeling in my right hand."