Phoenix POV:
It feels like I am numb. Can't feel pain. Can't feel anything. I am drowning, yet I am not. As I stare out towards the sea I wonder, how can people be so cruel? How did they master the art of breaking an already broken person. The sun is setting. The colors mixing and creating a master piece, while I stare at my painting that is filled with darkness just like my soul. I look at the cliff, knowing my heart is harder than its rock. Can't I be normal like the everyday salty wind blowing. Am I broken beyond repair or is there still hope. Hope a word foreign to many. Will their hearts be filled with nothing but darkness like mine. I am numb. I am numb to pain. I am numb to happiness. Please stop me as I walk into the darkened once beautiful waters. Why isn't anyone stopping me? Am I alone? Help! Help! My head is screaming, not because I am drowning. Because I am lonely. My demons taunt me. My demons mock me. Telling how weak I am. I know. How unwanted I am. I know. How hated I am. STOP! Stop! If they don't care then, let them be. Let us bide our time. Let me welcome the demons inside.
They never cared, now they will. I became the monster under their bed because they told me. I become ice cold because they made me. I became lonely because they left me. I became ashes because the burned me. I shattered into a million pieces because they throw me away. 1 little thing after million others takes it all to be gone. How many will I bend before I snap? They think I am the little girl hiding in the janitors closet running from my tormentors. They are wrong. They think I am the broken teenager with countless scars both mental and physical. They are wrong. They think I am the female with emotions all over the place. They are wrong. Because I don't hide and cry anymore. My scars are my pride. They made me who I am. Emotions are long forgotten by me. I am numb and that's how I want to be.
My eyes are hollow and my heart is stained. All I ever felt was pain. Now I welcome the numbness with open arms alongside my demons. I cried for too long. I felt lonely for too long. I hid for too long. But now I am numb. Immune to everything. I don't need anyone to fight for me. I once wanted someone to fight for me. Not anymore. I am my own past. Now I am letting go.
I stared of into darkness. A blanket of clouds over my head. I scream and scream, but no one hears. Why? Because they are of living their perfect lives with their families. I am here broken with a blanket of clouds and the sound of waves crashing. I welcome darkness with a can of beer. An old friend who never left me alone.
They wanted me to break. I broke. They wanted to see me cry. I cried. They wanted to see me in pain. I have scars all over my body. Not anymore. I am numb. " You hear that I am numb, broken and used, but not anymore. It is my time to shine. It is my time to rise," I shouted and chuckled darkly. I threw the can in my car and gripped the steering wheel" Hello world! Here comes the new and cold me." With that I drove away.
It is like a filler chapter. Bout what she is feeling and how she is taking all of it. I may not be able to update in the upcoming week. Vote, comment and enjoy
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I Am The Phoenix ( On Hold)
RandomThere was once a very beautiful, yet a very broken girl. She was young, but mature. Her mom died giving birth to her. Her 7 brothers and her father pushed her away, when she was only a child. They drowned themselves into work, fame, sports and schoo...
