Life through a string of kisses

Prologue: The Privilege of Hindsight

* This is a potential Prologue. It is not necessarily needed to understand the story. Just a nice way to see a new perspective. *

Peace had washed over her like a gentle wave. It was almost as if she had gone to sleep while the tide was out, only to be awoken surrounded by the warm water. Peace had gradually settled into her soul and now it felt as if it had always been there. Peace was now an old friend, who she couldn't remember meeting but whom it felt like had always been there.

She vaguely remembered the worried girl she once was, but was struck by the nostalgic recognition she felt looking at her daughter on the other side of the sofa.
Rebecca's daughter Mandy was in a right state. Cheeks flushed, hands clammy, stuttering as if she had never learnt a language. This articulate, bright child had been brought to a bumbling mess, that while made Rebecca sympathetic, it also frustrated her to no end.
Mandy had been through breakups before, but this one was different. Rebecca could feel the cross roads as if she herself had drawn them out. This relationship turmoil was going to change Mandy's perspective on the world and how she tackled it. And as usual, Rebecca refused to take a passive response.
She leaned forward and put her hand on the shaking child's back. Once again she scolded herself for referring to the now young woman before her, as a child. Habits were always hard to crack. But then again, no matter how much Mandy changed her hair, or dressed like a catwalk model, the girl in front of her would always be her baby girl. The gentle cooing sounds she was making, and the swirling motion on the girl's back, reinforced this belief.
"Shhhh, it's okay, it's okay" Rebecca gently spoke, knowing full well what Mandy's response would be.
Shaking her head, Mandy cried harder into her hands and leaned into her mother. She felt consumed by this heartache, and her mother's words, although kind, felt empty and untrue. How could her mother understand this pain. It just didn't seem possible.

"Trust me, I know how much this hurts. But it will be okay, I promise you that."
Mandy once again shook her head, but the tears had stopped coming enough for her to speak.
"In my head I know you're right. But in my heart I feel this ache that seems impossible to feel. I honestly don't know, this time, if I'm making the right decision or not. I just don't know. I feel like my heart and head are telling me two different things."

These words resonated with Rebecca, more than her daughter would ever know. But maybe that would be how she could get through to the teary eyed girl.

"I felt the exact same way, when I was younger", Rebecca responded causing
Mandy's eyes to widen. She knew her mother had dated other people, but the idea that this headstrong woman before her could ever feel this fickle, just didn't seem possible.

"You know, somehow I doubt that" Mandy cracked a smile, and for a moment felt the weight lift from her chest before it once again returned.

Rebecca smiled in response, happy to see her daughter's attempt at humour no matter how wrong she was.

"Okay, fine." She stated resolutely. "I'll tell you all about it. And after I've spilt my guts and you've said you were wrong. I want you to tell me all about what Jacob did. Deal?" And with that Rebecca stood up and walked to turn on the kettle. Where to start this story would be challenging, but she guessed starting just before she truly felt lost, was as good of place as any to start.