The Boy Movie Brahms Heelshire x reader FanFic

Inside Brahms - Part 64

She came back.

I'm behind the walls when the front door opens and she steps inside.   I heard the car tyres on the gravel drive, so passed through the hidden panels.  This has become my habit since she left...to hide away again when people come.  It's been easy to slip back into obscurity...easy to get used to being alone.   

But she's come back, and she's not alone.

I press my forehead to warm rosewood, my fingers lingering on silent, oiled hinges.  I didn't expect this.  Never dreamed she'd return.  Why would she?   And to what?   For me?  Why?

There are three of them.  Her footsteps and two sets lighter.   Who would she bring here with her?  How can she do this to me?

This has angered me.   She dares to put me in a position of emotional jeopardy!  Bringing strangers here.  I see her with another man, and the anger bursts into a fury that makes me want to rip her apart.   But my rage is always silent, dark and dangerous.  With cold determination, I press the hinges and the panels swings open noiselessly.

I stand in the shadows, waiting.

The kitchen light is on.  She's preparing food.   But for who?   

I'm glad I'm wearing the mask.   I don't want her to see me.  To see how I feel.   And in that moment, I wonder why I'm even thinking this way.   After all this time her voice still rings clear in my mind.

"You wouldn't hurt me, would you, Brahms?"

I close my eyes, remembering.  I couldn't hurt her back then, and I know I can't hurt her now.   What she left behind still burns as strongly as it did then.   She was the only person who truly loved me.  How can that ever be broken apart?

But I'm not so naive I don't know that a woman like her could never be alone for long.   Five years is a lifetime to be apart.    And maybe love can wear out.  But then why has she come back?

My head hurts with all the questions and conflicts.   Yet I stand here cold and still as a statue, and as though made of stone I can't move.  I feel paralysed by self doubt and an aching love I can't fill.   Has she come to take control of the estate my parents left?    To get rid of me?  To...

She steps into the hallway, and pushes everything out of me but wonder.    She feels me before she sees.  Just as she always did.   Her eyes meet mine through the shadows and I feel the anchor that holds us...the bonds that were never severed, and my breath catches in my throat.

Slowly, I walk into the light.   I'm little changed, but she's more beautiful than I've ever seen her. 

The two dark haired children flanking her stare up at me with unwavering identical pale eyes.   I stare down at them as a thought too terrible to contemplate starts to revolve and grow.   

"Who is that, Mama?"

I glare back up at her, wanting my own answers.    Her voice, so beloved, so unchanged, takes my heart and wrings every vestige of hurt and anger from it.

"This is your father."