𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖋𝖊𝖈𝖙 𝖋𝖔𝖗 𝖒𝖊

5• the party

TRIGGER WARNING: SELF HARMING
MATTHEW:
i was sitting in my bed when a guy from school called Marcus texted me about his pool party. well, i definitely didn't want to go, but which type of boy looses an opportunity of seeing girls in bikinis? anyways, i could hear my parents arguing in their bedroom again. i can't do this anymore. i'm tired of pretending it doesn't hurt! i'm almost 18, but those words really break my heart in pieces, my father treating my mom and me like that is unacceptable, but i can't do much to change that. even tho my father is an idiot, he's right about me: i'm an accident, i shouldn't be here, i wish i was dead... suddenly, i saw a piece of glass in the floor. some thoughts came into my mind and i realized i had nothing to loose, my father hates me and it's better if i just do it already. i started cutting my left arm with that glass, it hurt, but it was taking my pain away, i was forgetting the things my father said, i was relaxing while that blood came out of my arm, i could only feel physical pain, which didn't seem like a bad idea in that moment. no one cares about me, i'm already used to that shit. everybody would be better if i was gone.

VIOLET:
"Vi! thank god you came!" Noah said, hugging me.
"hi, bro! nice to see you." i replied, smiling.
"by the way, this blue dress looks amazing on you, those coconuts drawn in it make it look perfect." he complimented.
"oh my god, thanks! it's matching with the bikini i'm using under it." i said.
i went to the table where Lauren and her girlfriend were.
"hey!" i said.
"hi! Vi, this is Rose. i like the fact that you two have flower names." Lauren joked.
we laughed and i shook the girl's hand. she died her hair pink, that looked gorgeous!
"let's go swim!" Noah said.
"now? isn't the water cold?" Rose asked.
"i can keep you warm, baby." Lauren answered, grabbing her waist.
"okay, let's go Vi!" Noah called.
i took my dress off and put it on the table.
"wow..." Noah mumbled.
"what?" i asked.
"your body is beautiful." he answered.
i blushed after he said that, i don't even remember when was the last time a boy said that to me.
"thank you." i replied, getting into the pool.
we stared at each other for some seconds, his green eyes were beautiful. i started swimming and it felt like that party was a good idea, i was feeling more relaxed and kinda happy!
"you're so pretty, Violet." Noah said.
"you're handsome too, Noah." i replied.
we got closer and stared at each other, i could feel his deep breath, while that water involved my body.
"what would you do if i kissed you right know?" he asked, grabbing my waist.
"i would kiss you back." i answered.
he didn't say anything else after that, he just kissed me. his tongue was hot and our lips seemed to fit in.
"that was good." i said.
"we can do that more often." he said, smiling.
suddenly i realized i wasn't in love with him, i just liked the kiss. it was a friday night, i was in a hot pool with a boy, it was just a kiss!
"yeah, i guess... but no dating please." i mumbled.
"who said anything about dating? i was wondering if we could do something else." he replied, with a naughty smile.
i was confused, but then he pointed to a unisex bathroom. okay, that's wasn't a bad idea but i didn't feel like it.
"i don't have condoms." i said.
"who said we needed them?" he asked.
i was getting uncomfortable with all of that, it wasn't what i wanted, i was having a panic attack inside that pool.
"i have to go." i said, getting out of the pool.
i got a towel and ran to a dark hallway in the house. suddenly, i heard a voice.
mom, please! take me home.
it seemed like a boy talking. i shouldn't go after that voice, but i decided it'd not be bad. after some time walking, i found the boy.