Love Lies Bleeding || gerard way

Eleven

*MAY BE TRIGGERING*

Helenas POV

"Hello Helena...."

I burst out giggling as I saw Frank pushing me up against the wall.

"You scared me you dick." I said giggling. He smirked evilly and let me go. My heart was poundng. I honestly thought it was Ben or one of his gang. Im way to jumpy. Me and Frank both walk to the lunch room in silence. We enter the crowded hall and scan the room for Gerard and the guys.

Soon I see Bob waving us over. We smile and run in and out of tables to our group. I sit down and Gerard hands me some water and a slice of Pizza. He knows me so well. As soon as I take a bite out of the pizza, a squeaky voice comes from behind me.

"Look at her the fat bitch!" It shrieked. I rolled my eyes. Her words still bothered me immensly but I had to act like the strong on this occasion. I could cry later. I stood up, placing my pizza on its plate. I sigh a shaky breath before turning to her. Of course, it was Ashley, the school slut and one of the populars. She'd fucked almost every guy in the cafeteria including Gerard. Excluding Frank and the other guys. They just didnt roll that way. 

"Why dont you just fuck off?" I said, feeling tired with her shit already. She smirked at me and grabbed my wrist. She pulled up my sleeve, revealing the numerous cuts. Everyone gasped. 

Fuck. No. That. Bitch. 

Tears fill my eyes and hatred fills my head. She just revealed to everyone I was a cutter. An emo. A self harmer. Whatever you want to call it. I rip my arm away from her and grit my teeth. 

"Noboy. NOBODY TOUCHES ME!" I roar. Tears stream down my face and I turn on my heels and run out of the hall. Before I got out, everything was still silent. 

"Hey baby. You dont want to date a emo now do you? You want someone perfect like me." I heard Ashley say loudly. I sob once more before running out of the lunch room. I run to the bathroom and slid my ass down on the wall. Why would she do that? Did she know that I cut? How did she find out? I didnt even care. She just announced it to everyone. The whole school knows I self harm. 

I wipe my sore eyes and stand up and wobble out of the bathroom. Luckily, everyone was still at lunch so the hallways were empty. I walked to the nurses office, so I could be dismissed to go home. I open the door and the nurse turns around with a smile, but it drops when she sees my state. 

"Sweetie, are you okay?" She asked, helping me over to a seat. I shake my head. I needed to tell somebody. "What happened?" 

"In the" Sniffle, "Lunch room." Hiccup. "Ashley." Sob "Saw my cuts." And I burst into fresh tears. The nurse looked confused so I pulled up my sleeves and showed her my hundreds of cuts. She gasps like the people in the lunch hall did. He fingers trace over my scars and my tears fall onto them. 

"Sweetie....Why?" I shrug. I new why. Because I was so depressed. So sad. "Please dont do this anymore...."

I nod. 

"Please dont tell anybody..." I whisper, pleadly. She considers other things but promises not to tell any body. She gives me a pass and marks me off for the rest of the day. I grab my stuff from my locker and begin the journey home. I kick the rocks and the song on my phone stops playing. I sigh loudly to see Gerards contact pop up. I decline and turn off my phone. I turn into a local corner shop and pick up a pack of shaving razors. 

"Just these please." I smile at the lady behind the counter. 

"Dont do anything stupid, sweetie." What was sit with people and the word 'sweetie'? I furrow my eyebrows. "I can see the look on your face." She said, handing me my five dollars change. I just nod and walk out of the store. I walk down the street, the pack of razors in hand and I turn into the park where me and Gerard kissed. I sit in the place I was crying before and ripped open the packet with my numb fingers. My hands were shaking. I cracked open a razor and and looked at its shiny, appealing surface. I rolled up my sleeve and and take the first cut.

Second cut....

Third cut...

Fourth cut..

Fifth cut...

Twenty cuts later, my forearm was covered in more slices. I was about the put the razor on my arm again when I heard my name being yelled. I turned my head and saw Gerard and the guys running towards me. I threw the razor down. What I did was stupid. Now Gerard wont want me even more now. I was so ugly, so broken. I should be thrown away, like a broken toy, a faulty toy. Tears fill my eyes and fall down my cheeks. I put my bloody hands on my face, my arm was weeping with blood, it was stinging but I didnt even care right now. I felt my body being taken into someones arms and I buried my face in his chest. I could tell by the scent who it was.

Gerard. 

"Shh...Dont cry baby...." She cooed. I sniffled. "I dont love you any less...Remember that." He was lying I knew he was. 

"Dont lie..." I sob. 

"Im not...." He soothes. I give up and go limp in his arms. He pulls away and looks at the bloodstained razor next to me then at my arm. His eyes pool with tears and he runs his fingers over the fresh slices. I wince in pain and he groans a little.

"This is my fault...." He whispers. I shake my head. "I shouldve come after you" I decide not to say anything. "Come on. Lets go home." He picks me up bridal and I stuff my head down into his chest. 

"Is she okay?"

"What happened?" 

"What did she do?" 

"Is she okay?" 

Questions. So many of them. I gnored them and managed to fall asleep in Gerards arms. 

I want to leave. I want to run away.