She wanted to die.
He wanted to live.
•••
A hand grabbed onto my wrist, yanking me back just as the train rushed past, before I'd even had time to comprehend whether or not I'd carry out the action. I stumbled back into the person's chest, my hear...
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Stepping back onto solid ground was a long-awaited joy I never thought I would be so ecstatic to experience.
Heights were a fear that I'd never thought I would have to face, since I profusely refused to be any higher than second floor level, and even then I still faced overwhelming amounts of vertigo from simply knowing that the ground wasn't directly beneath my feet. I hated feeling unstable - hated feeling like the ground could collapse from under my feet at any second - but it wasn't the thought of falling that had me petrified, but rather the mere premise of being high up.
Since I was a kid, everyone around me knew that I hated heights and made sure to avoid exposing me to them. My parents converted the downstairs office into a bedroom since climbing up the stairs alone was a dizzying experience, and my regular room, which had recently become my permanent home, was located on the ground floor. I avoided places which I knew would require me to be above ground level, and structured the little control I had over my life in order to avoid circumstances which left me feeling uneasy.
And yet after a few hours with a girl I knew so much yet so little about, I had found myself sat on a bridge suspended in the air as I faced the fear I was so desperate to avoid.
But it was worth it.
Hearing her sweet laughter and getting to draw out her infectious smile, indulging in the gentle bliss of seeing Cassie let down her guard, was well worth being absolutely terrified for nearly an hour. And I would do it all again if I got to relive the moments where she was cushioned into my side, her hazel eyes glinting up at me with a soft smile pulling at her lips as the fading stars enjoyed their final moments. Even now, with our arms linked as I took my first step back to safety and stood on actual solid ground, I knew I would've turned right back around and walked straight onto the bridge if she'd wanted to. For Cassie, it was worth it.
However, none of that changed the instant rush of serenity that hit me the moment I was completely off the bridge. I let out an audible sigh of relief as Cassie laughed softly at my reaction, a relaxed smile tugging at my lips as I felt all the tension dissipate from my body. A loose chestnut curl hung in front of her face, her beaming smile as she teased me enough of a distraction from her actual words while the high of somewhat successfully facing my fear coursed through my veins, a rush of natural exhilaration and ecstasy regaining my previously lost energy.
With our arms still linked together, we strolled leisurely in the direction of the Tate Modern since it was well within walking distance, passing by speed-walking businessmen and various commuters all on their way to work, the buzz of hurried chatter and the clicks of high-heeled shoes blurring together in the light hum of the early morning city. It was a sharp contrast to the sleeping city we'd travelled through during the course of the night, now with much more people passing by to and fro as London began to awaken from its peaceful slumber.
"Seriously though, well done," she halted her teasing, her words taking on an earnest tone as her hazel eyes flitted up to hold my gaze. "For not running off the minute I dragged you onto the bridge. For not complaining that much, even though I practically forced you on there." We shared a small smile at that, my mind recollecting my immediate reluctance when Cassie pulled me along the Millennium Bridge and more or less had to drag me to the centre.
