An Angel's Heart

Friend-Zoned

Pha sat at the top of the steps, staring at Yo's door, waiting nervously for the brother to leave. He'd asked Yo to be his boyfriend, just like that, out of the blue. But before Yo could answer, his brother had arrived and everything went wrong. Arthit had barely challenged him, and he'd folded like a cheap suitcase. He felt like a jerk. He could have said anything: friend, boyfriend, future husband, but he'd been silent. It had taken Arthit less than a minute to see him for the spineless disappointment that he was.

Today he'd held Yo in his arms for only a few minutes, but those minutes had been the best of his whole life. Then, instead of being strong and brave, like he'd always thought he would be for his love, he'd let Pring hurt Yo and Arthit scare him away.

Pha knew he had to do better and that started with apologizing to Yo. Unfortunately, he was too much of a coward to do it when the protective brother was still in the room. So he waited, sitting on the top step of the stairs, watching Yo's door like a crazy stalker. Of course, Pring walked up while he was waiting. He couldn't blame it on her bad timing, he had to blame it on his own stupidity. Put enough negative energy into the world and it will always come back to you. Pring must be the result of his own bad Karma.

"Pha, were you waiting for me?" Pring asked, smiling sweetly. Apparently she forgot that he'd told her to stay away from him less than four hours ago.

"No," Pha said quickly. "I'm going to visit Yo."

"Don't be ridiculous," Pring said, her voice turning sour. "What does that boy have that I don't?"

Pha was thinking of a snappy comeback, something along the lines of "my heart," when Arthit came walking out of Yo's room. Pha stood up, wondering if he could hide until Arthit passed, when Pring grabbed his arm and turned him back to face her.

Pha wiggled out of her grasp, hoping Arthit hadn't noticed him, but when he looked that way again, the man in question was gone. Pha looked around, Arthit would have had to go past Pha and Pring to get to the only other staircase in the building. The other exits were fire ladders that had been installed in each of the rooms. Pha realized that Arthit must have gone back inside Yo's room.

Disappointment flooded through him when he realized that Arthit might be planning to spend the night. He pushed past Pring and went down to his room, stomping like a child throwing a tantrum. As soon as he slammed his door shut, he called his two friends.

"You do know that I hate group calls, right?" Kit asked, skipping the hello. "It's hard to hear if people try to talk at the same time."

"Then get over here," Pha responded. "I need advice."

"Condoms and lube," Beam answered without waiting for his question. "I've got some videos I can loan you if you need more help than that."

"Why are we friends?" Kit asked. He considered hanging up but decided to try to help Pha. "Just tell us what's wrong."

"I told Yo that I want him to be my boyfriend," Pha said bitterly. His two friends made exclamations of surprise before understanding that Pha's tone meant something had gone wrong.

"He said no?" Beam asked at the same time that Kit tried to console Pha with, "It might have been a little too soon."

"He didn't answer," Pha explained. "The brother came and asked me about our relationship and I froze like a Popsicle. Then he made me go away."

"Harsh," Kit responded, but Beam laughed and asked, "So you crawled away like an insect? Or is that mixing metaphors? Wait, can you mix similes? Maybe it's an analogy, I always get those confused."

Pha looked at his phone with an angry expression, as though Beam could see it, before dropping his head to his chest in defeat. Pha couldn't help thinking about what a loser he was. If he wanted Yo to be his boyfriend, he'd eventually have to tell other people that they were dating, including the scary brother. If Pha wanted Yo, he was just going to have to man up. Realizing he would do anything to be with Yo, Pha smiled to himself.

"I've gotta go, thanks for the help," Pha said and hung up, ignoring his friends who were asking what they'd done.

Pha ran back up the stairs to Yo's room and knocked on the door. He didn't care if Arthit was still there, he had to talk to Yo. The door opened to a surprised looking Yo, who moved to allow Pha inside when he asked to enter. Pha had been prepared to have to defend himself to Arthit as soon as he walked in the room, but all his bluster died when he only saw a black cat resting in the corner.

"I'm sorry, Yo," Pha said, changing plans now to deal with Yo first. He'd have to fight with Arthit later.

"Have you done something that needs forgiveness in the last 30 minutes?" Yo asked, looking at Pha with amusement.

"I didn't stand up for you when Pring hurt you," Pha started to list his failures of the day. "I wasn't honest with your brother, even though I told you that I wanted you to be mine."

Pha was about to add that he'd run off like a coward when Yo interrupted him, "Do you really?"

"Do I really what?"

"Do you really want me to be yours?" Yo asked, his face covered with that adorable blush again.

"Yes!" Pha stepped forward and immediately pulled Yo into his arms. He was a greedy giant, just like Beam had said, but he couldn't help it. For him, it was love at first sight, he couldn't let Yo get away. "I know I suck. I haven't done anything to show that I can be good to you, but I just want a chance."

"I think it would be better if we waited," Yo said, smiling gently at the taller man. "Get to know each other better first. We should let things develop more naturally. Start out as friends and make sure this is what you really want."

"Oh, sure," Pha said, his arms dropping to his side and his shoulders sagging. He could feel tears forming in his eyes, so he turned to leave. Without any other words, Pha turned and walked out of Yo's apartment, leaving Yo wondering what he'd done wrong.

Pha returned to his own room, picked up his phone and texted his friends. Fifteen minutes later, they were there.

"What happened? You look like death warmed over," Beam said, sitting on Pha's bed where Pha was laid down staring at the ceiling with tears streaming down his face.

"I did what you said, I went back up to Yo's room to fight for him," Pha started, choking back his sobs, "but he said he just wants to be friends."

************

Yo watched as Pha practically ran out the door, wondering what had just gone wrong. He'd been in Pha's arms one minute and Pha was gone the next. Yo had been hoping they could talk, spend some time alone together, but Pha hadn't even said goodbye.

He'd been on the verge of telling Pha that he would be his, when Mau's soft meow reminded him of his promise to his brother. So he'd asked Pha for some time. If they could get to know each other better, Yo could keep his promise and give Pha time to be sure of his feelings before making a decision that would affect Yo's eternity. He frowned, thinking he might have made a mistake. Maybe Arthit was right. Pha wasn't the kind of man who could be trusted with an angel's heart.

Friendship seemed like the perfect solution, but apparently Pha hadn't been pleased. Yo didn't understand, when he'd gone through his training before coming to the human world, he'd been led to believe that friendship was an important component in strong romantic relationships. Sexual attraction was just a start, if you couldn't get along when you were both fully dressed, how could you live together for the rest of your lives?

It was true that humans didn't stay mortal forever, eventually they all died and returned to the divine realms to either make peace with their mortal lives or to face their regrets. But he'd been told that humans felt the years pass very slowly, that 80 or 90 years for them was regarded as a long lifetime. Why would anyone want to spend what they might believe was their only life with someone they couldn't even count as a friend?

"What happened, Mau?" Yo asked his feline friend. Mau had lived in the human realms for many human lifetimes, surely she would know.

Mau answered with her sweet purring voice, telling him that Pha wasn't happy with friendship. Pha didn't want to be his friend? She jumped into Yo's arms and rubbed against him, soothing the pain in his heart. Another purr let him know that he should wait and see what happened. He petted her soft fur, happy to have her with him. The human world was a very confusing place.