HEALING THE SCARS

CHAPTER 44

PENELOPE'S POV

Dylan and I almost had sex, but luckily, the phone call interrupted us, stopping it from happening. I saw his reaction when I asked him to use protection. There was a suspicion at the back of my mind, a nagging doubt that he wanted to sleep with me without protection because he had an ulterior motive. My suspicions grew stronger when he spoke in his sleep. Asking him to use protection was a test, a way to confirm what I feared. But when he finally took out the condom from the bedside drawer, I had second thoughts. Maybe he didn't want to get me pregnant. Maybe he was being genuine. But I didn't trust him. This is what he wanted. Maybe. But what if I did get pregnant, and then he wanted me to get an abortion, just like last time? I should have thought about protection from the start. I was so furious with myself. I promised myself that I would go to my doctor and get checked.

I chose to ignore him for the rest of the night, hoping that ignoring him would make him leave me alone. It was also a way to avoid having sex with him. My body, on the other hand, was a hot mess. Dylan had made me orgasm with his tongue, and my body craved more of him, like an addict needing a fix. When I finally told him that whatever was happening between us could no longer happen, he looked really hurt. The thing is, I couldn't tell if he was being serious or not. Dylan was a master of manipulation, and he could be tricking me into wanting to be with him. He could be faking the hurt.

But when I mentioned that I didn't want him to destroy Jason, that was the last straw for him. He grabbed me, pushed me to the headboard of the bed, and choked me, telling me that unless I had Jason alone, I should stop saying he was only my son. I was terrified. The danger in his eyes scared me so much that I felt tears welling up. He noticed and immediately let go of me, regret and worry washing over his face. His eyes softened, and he took a deep breath before leaving the room. I almost wanted to run after him, but my body was rooted to the bed. After he left, I let out a huge breath I hadn't even realized I was holding.

I quickly ran to the bathroom and puked my guts out until there was nothing left in my stomach. After cleaning up, I went back to bed and tried to sleep. I couldn't. I quietly walked to the living room to see what Dylan was doing. He seemed to be struggling to sleep too. I stood there and watched him toss and turn on the couch, and after what felt like an eternity, I sat down on the floor, leaning my head against the wall, lost in my thoughts as I watched him finally drift off. After a while, I got up, grabbed a blanket from his room, and covered him with it. He turned, and I saw how sad he looked even in his sleep. I knew I couldn't take everything away from him. I moved to walk away but hit my foot on the table and woke him up.

"Penelope?" he asked, confused. I froze.

"It's cold in here. I thought you might need a blanket."

"Thank you," he said, and we just stared at each other.

"I couldn't sleep knowing you were out here. Can we go to bed? Together?" I asked him. It took him a moment before he rose, and I followed him back to bed. It was already past midnight, and I was really tired. By the look on his face, he seemed exhausted too. We got into bed, and he lay at the furthest corner away from me. I knew he did that to give me some space, but I honestly didn't want any space, so I moved closer to him and cuddled up. After hesitating for a while, he wrapped his arms around me, and we stayed in silence until we both drifted off.

I woke to my alarm sounding, and I was so upset because I hadn't gotten a good sleep at all. I silenced my phone and turned to face Dylan, who was still asleep. He looked beautiful and peaceful. I brushed a strand of hair from his face, and his lips formed a little smile. He was awake.

"You look very beautiful," he said, making me blush as I burrowed deeper into the sheets. He pulled me close and kissed my forehead.

"Did you sleep well?" he asked.