𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐉𝐄𝐂𝐓 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐃𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐑⁰¹ʰᵉᵐᵐⁱⁿᵍˢ✓

³⁸are we good

clementine

In moments of pure adrenaline, when my chest tightens from the excitement and my heart races like a motherfucker, I always feel like I'm floating, like I'm a mirage and I'm not really here.

But I am here and so is Luke, standing in front of me with eyes wide in shock.

I notice that his hair has grown a little longer and that his under eyes are a little darker. He looks a little tired, a little worn out, but nevertheless, he's just as physically wonderful as he was when I first met him.

He's also seemed to have shaved off his slight stubble, his chin and jaw smoother than when we last saw each other.

"I like what you've done with your hair," He says, breaking the silence.

God, I miss your voice.

I laugh nervously, nodding. "Thanks, Wyatt cut it for me," I run my fingers through my hair at an attempt to tame it. "It was sort of a spontaneous kind of thing. I didn't think much about it,"

He nods, and I feel as though he knows how awkward this all feels. "Oh, yeah? It looks nice, it... um... frames your face really well," He awkwardly clears his throat and presses a smile.

I swallow the lump in my throat, vision blurring as I let the unshed tears cloud his face. "I miss you," I throw my arms around his neck and hold him close in an embrace, tiptoeing to meet his height and tucking my face in the crook of his neck. "Is it weird to say I missed you a lot?"

He stumbles back a bit but quickly recovers, slowly moving his arms around my waist and pressing his face to my hair. "No, 'cause I missed you a lot too,"

I couldn't care less if we're just friends and that friends don't hug each other like long lost lovers, it doesn't matter as much as how I feel right now, absolutely torn down by everything, and I'm willing to hold onto Luke just to steady myself.

The scent on his band tee reminds me of freshly-baked muffins, steaming and warm just out of the oven, and I give a small smile. "You smell like a bakery," I say with a huff of a laugh.

He gives a low chuckle, his chest vibrating and moving me. "Hah, that's 'cause we stopped by a bakery on the way. We didn't get to eat much on the plane," He rests his chin on my head and tightens his hold around me, pressing my body against his.

My heart rapidly beats, and I feel as though it's loud enough to reverberate throughout his own body.

My mind immediately returns to Aiden, how he never made me feel this way and how the butterflies in my stomach from when we first met became neglected, bruised, then simply burnt to ash.

He had never made my heart race so much that I feared he might feel it within me, never made me have such distaste of not being with him, or made me treasure time just because I felt as though nobody could treat me better; not as much as Luke does.

God, why am I comparing them?

"Are you okay?" He asks, his hand gently rubbing my back, his breath warm against my ear.

I nod, sniffing a bit as a few tears escaped when I closed my eyes. "Now that you're here, yeah," I pull away and leave some space between us, folding my arms in front of me and clearing my throat. "How've you been? How was tour?"

I want him to talk all day long because God knows I miss the way he sounds, the expressions he makes, the way he looks at me.

I love it when he talks and his voice makes the butterflies in my stomach erupt into a whole universe, like stars blinking in the hues of violets and blues, echoing throughout my whole body, saying This man is a treasure.

He shrugs, shoving his hands into his pockets. "It was good, it felt good being back on stage again. Can't say the same for being interviewed the same questions," He nods and I copy his actions.

"How long are you here for? In New York, I mean,"

His face falters in such a minuscule way, yet I notice it right away. "A week," He answers, trying to put on a brave smile. "It's sort of a week-long rest before we start our promo tour in Europe,"

I nod, understanding that this is his life. If I want to be his friend, I know I'd have to accept the fact that he won't always be with me. "Okay, that's okay. Europe's wonderful. You'll have fun," I smile and try to keep my tone positive, but I know he senses something off.

"But after mid-December, we're free until January," He adds. "The guys and I don't really have plans to go back home, we've sort of started writing for the fifth album already and Ashton was really up for just a sort of... Christmas writing getaway," He laughs at the idea but I think it sounds sweet.

"Any ideas as to where you'll be staying?"

He shrugs. "Not yet, but we should probably decide soon. Everyday after mid-January is planned to what we're eating and drinking," Once again, he laughs it off like it's such a casual thing to say.

I want to say so much before he leaves again, break out into a speech of pure, heartfelt fondness, say the most appealing string of confessions and hopefully still be thought of the same way afterwards; but I'm afraid this is the worst time - not that I'd recognise what a good time would look like.

"Hey, I'm sorry for scaring you off last time," He says, eyes drawn down to the floor like a nervous kid. "I think I can be a bit too forward at times,"

I shake my head, guilt seeping back into me. "No, you didn't scare me. That wasn't what I meant," I clarify, taking a step closer to him. "I should tell you that I'm a wuss who cannot handle change that well, so I get scared, and I pull away... and that's what I did to you. I shouldn't have,"

His brows show a second of concern before morphing to one of relief. "Well, then I'm sorry for misreading it and being cold. That wasn't very nice of me," He laughs it off.

"I got a promotion, by the way," I add with a smile. "I took it too. Next year, I'll be the head of the realism department," I say proudly, biting down on my lip as I tried my best to be focused more on the job than the moving away part.

Luke's eyes light up at the news, mouth breaking to his dimpled grin. "Clem, that's wonderful!" He exclaims, leaning forward and engulfing me in his arms once again, swaying left and right as laughs escaped us. "You're going to be so great at it,"

I shake my head, unsure of how good I might be in the job. Though I'm doing considerably well nowadays, working better than I did before, this time with healthier time management.

I've been coming at around eight, lunch at one, and return back at eight or nine. I've been proud of being able to obtain healthier habits, and it's as though Luke's arrival is some sort of ribbon, a bow to top it off.

I send a smile his way and he returns it, eyes locking, and my heart remains to race. "Are we okay now?" I ask, my voice close to a whisper but I take it that he heard as he slowly nods.

"We're okay now," He assures me. "I was going to a - "

"Clem, the band's team is here!" Marisse's voice echoes through the hall, her footsteps increasing in volume.

Luke and I whip our heads to the open door as Marisse pops up from the door frame with a grin on her face. "I don't think Luke is - " Her grin immediately falls the second she lays eyes on Luke standing beside me, brows cocked at the sight of us already together.

"Here..." She finishes her sentence, looking back and forth Luke and I with an open mouth.

"But he is," I say with a playful grin.

"But I am," Luke adds.