Obstacles

20.

Friday afternoon

Alicia's parents were so angry at the situation. They blamed me for almost getting her killed and I don't think Alicia even corrected them.

Everyone is mad. They're either mad because I put her in that situation or say I shouldn't have been around Cacie anyway. They're looking besides the fact that Cacie is dead and gone and I couldn't do anything more to help.

There was a knock at my door and Kelci and mason walked in.

"What's up ? " I said and they just stared at me.

Kelci sighed , "We need to talk to you about what happened. The funeral is tomorrow and you haven't said a word since we picked you up from the hospital days ago . "

"And you I know you're feeling some type of way. you haven't even been talking to Dison. I don't know what you and Cacie had going on but it needs to be let out so you can move on " Mason added.

"I mean it's really nothing to talk about . everybody is already blaming me. Alicia and I haven't even really talked , her parents won't let me come around . Cacie's folks are upset but I don't blame them they just lost their last child and I couldn't even save her."

I felt a tear roll down my cheek and quickly wiped it away.

"I understand ." mas said sitting next to me. "You've clearly experienced a lot of hurt and loss in your life at a young age already. I lost my dad young and then when your dad got locked up I felt like I lost a second father. I've seen niggas get killed right In front of me , truthfully, I shot some . don't judge me . I've been shot and almost died , I've almost lost the most important person in my life to another person." he said looking at Kelci and continued

"But man honestly time heals . I'm not telling you to get over it now and not feel the pain but you have to find a way to release it instead of sitting here all cooped up bottling it in. You did what you could and that's what matters don't feel like it's your fault. you can't take the fall of another mans actions. you didn't pull the gun out or pull the trigger."

"I know Mas. I'm just hurting man. she was my friend before anything even happened between us. "

Kelci walked over and hugged me.

"I've lost a friend before back in high school years ago and truthfully we were more than friends once at certain a time but figured friendship was our best bet. After I moved to Georgia we stayed close and talked as much as we could and on October 8 2012 I find out he had been in a car accident and died instantly from impact. The hardest part was that he had texted me a week or two before and I was just too busy to get back to him and I felt like shit after that. I let everything get in the way and I couldn't even make it to his funeral . I just wasn't in the position to leave town . that was a depressing point . so I know how it feels to feel guilty and feel like there was nothing more you could do."

We sat there for a moment.

"We love you man. Even though you're my cousin, I love you more than that. You're apart of this family. We appreciate the maturity and love you show around this household." Mason said.

And with that they walked out my room. I sighed and flopped back on my bed with my face in my hands.

Like Mas said . 'Time Heals'