Gxg Imagines and preferences

Dont do this to yourself..- Josie Saltzman ⚠️

'You are worthless. Why would she ever love you? She never loved you. You are so ugly. You are not worth love..Penelope is better off without you.' The voice says. I continue slicing my wrists. When I get to 10 I stop. I realize that I relapsed after 2 years.

"No!" I sob. I drop the razor and look at the blood dripping down. I sigh and plop down on my bed. I realize that it's 7:00 and I should start getting ready because I have to be at class in 30 minutes.

I grab a black hoodie and some sweatpants. I put on my shoes and I go outside my room.

"Hi Y/N!" I hear Josie say. I sigh and prepare my self to put my fake smile on.

"Hi Jojo." I say with my fake smile. She smiles at me and I stare at her.

"You want to go eat breakfast?" She asks.

"Isn't Lizzie going to say something?" I asked annoyed. After affect of my cutting. She looks shocked.

"Oh..yeah.." she mutters. "It doesn't matter come on." She says as she pulls my arm. I wince but luckily she doesn't see.

We head into the lunch and suddenly eyes are on us and then everyone goes back to their conversations. I sigh heavily and Josie pulls me to her friend groups table.

"Hi Josie." Mg, Hope, and Landon(🤢) say together. "Hi Jojo." Lizzie says and then she eyes me disgustingly, like I just murdered everyone she loves.

I nervously play with my sleeves while Josie sits in the middle of me and Hope. I stare at the table while they talk.

"Hey Y/N come on let's get breakfast" Josie says while a smile. You don't deserve to eat. You are too fat. Say no. I'm actually really hungry..I can't eat. "N-no thanks I'm not hungry." I say. She nods and frowns but leaves to get her breakfast.

I just realize that Lizzie didn't get any food either. She looks to me and smirks. She takes something from her pocket and slides it over to me. I look down and see the used blade.. my heart stops.

"Why don't you do us ALL a favor and finish what you started.." she says as she smirks. I feel like breaking down. My eyes start to tear up and I take the blade and stand up with my book bag.

I leave the main area and go in the direction of my room. I walk faster when I hear Josie yelling my name. I go into my room and fall onto the bed. I start crying my eyes out. I spell the door shut and locked. I clutch onto a pillow and continue crying for a couple hours.

I get up and go into my bathroom. I grab the blade and look at myself in the mirror. Come on do it. Everyone will be happy. Even Lizzie said it. Do it! I sob and drop the blade.

"Y/N?" I hear Josie say. I rush to pick the blade up and start cutting. I sob even louder. I continue to do it until I hear Josie say, " Y/N! If you don't open this door I will siphon it open!" I sob again.

"That's it!" She says. I hear the room door open and soon after the bathroom door. Josie gasps as she sees all the blood rushing down my arms . She kneels down and starts muttering a spell for healing.

"This will heal it but It won't remove the scars.." she says while trying to contain her own tears. I nod and continue to sob in her shoulder. She picks me up bridal style and puts me down on the bed.

"Listen to me..I will NOT let you do this to yourself any longer. We can talk about what is the cause of everything tomorrow. Now you will lay with me for the rest of the night and relax ok?" She says. I nod and cuddle into her vanilla scent.
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3 weeks later
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Dear diary,
It has been getting better. I don't hear the voices as much as I used to and me and Josie have started dating. She is the best. She helped me throughout everything. I love her.

"Hi Joj-" I get cut off when I enter her room by me seeing her and Hope together in bed naked.

"Oh my god..Y/N this isn't what it looks like.." she whisper-yells. I start crying and I drop my anniversary gifts. I run to the roof and everything crashes back. She is just like Penelope. No one loves you any more. Maybe she was just using you. You should jump. Jump! The voices came back.. I stand up and make my way to the edge.

"Oh Y/N! Please back away from the ledge.."she cries out. I scoff.

"You don't care. Go back to ms.Tribrid..she's better for you anyway." I say I take another step. 2 more left. "Please Y/N it was a mistake I promise it won't happen again." She cries out. Liar, I take another step back.

"Do you even remember what today is?" I ask. She shakes her head. "Today was our anniversary. " I say as I scoff.

"Goodbye Josie. I hope you and Hope do good..better than me." I say I take a step back and put my arms out sideways before leaning back and falling off the building. "No!!" Is the last thing I hear from Josie.

The peaceful falling was the last thing I ever felt. It was the last nice thing I ever felt. I smile for the last time in my life and then I hit the ground. All of my worries, gone.

"Goodbye Jojo..I love you."

Stay safe guys. ❤️ Ik this one was a little INTENSE. But yeah byeeee