Lena's Love

Window Watchers

Eventually Tamiko and the girls have to go, but my mom invites them over anytime. For the next half an hour as we start to sort out the front room she chatters excitedly about how wonderful Tammy is and how this is definitely the right move for us and she just knows everything is going to be ok. Blah, blah, blah. Unfortunately, I don't quite share my moms positive view on things. Just because our neighbour is nice it doesn't automatically mean that moving to the small town of Ivywood is the best thing to ever happen to us. The neighbours we share a wall with could be human-sacrificing cult members for all we know.

A small part of me hopes I will make friends easily like my mum does when I have to start school next week. However I don't really have any pretty privilege or a jovial bubbly personality people get attached to. It makes it worse that I am joining a high school in senior year, which will make me stick out like an inky smudge on white paper, and all of the kids have probably known each other for years. I can cope with being alone though – I just need to keep my head down and graduate. The first week of stares, whispers and pointing will be the worst and then the road should smooth out.

I can't help but wonder what my neighbour Ajax looks like. Maybe he can be an ally I can sit with at school, but I'm not counting on it. Most teenage boys are imbecilic assholes, my two exes perfect examples.

I went round opening all of our windows (granted there aren't many) as I am surprised at how much warmer it is here in Savannah then in Atlanta, as we are apparently going through a heatwave. My hair is wet around my temples and my skin feels hot and clammy, but I am trying not to complain as I sit in front of the fan with Adrian. I have an icepack around my hand but it keeps melting and dripping all over me, and I haven't decided if it is bothersome or a relief.

I tried to put together my chest of drawers earlier, but it ended up collapsing and trapping my hand for a long, excruciating minute. The pain ebbs in waves but I think it is just bruised, along with my ego. I am now frustrated, all the more hot and disgustingly sweaty. My mom did ask if I needed any help, but I said no and I'm not going to turn my back on my decision and admit defeat now. The collapsed insufferable pieces of wood can lay in a sorry state for a few more days.

"Dinner's ready my loves!" My mother calls out in a singsong voice, and Adrian and I scramble into the kitchen to eat at the breakfast bar.

We have a simple yet delicious meal of chicken stir-fry, and I clean up the kitchen afterwards. I then go for a well-deserved shower, which luckily is heavy pressure and not a weak dribbler. I stand under the water for ages barely thinking until my mom bangs on the door reminding me there are other people in this family who don't appreciate cold showers. I huff as I turn the water off and wrap myself in a fluffy faded towel we stole from Jonathon's house. I leave a trail of soggy wet footprints across the landing as I hurry to my room, quickly ducking as I remember the window right opposite the door and yank the curtains closed. I ignore the collapsed draws as I pull my pyjamas on, and end up throwing a velvety blanket over the sorry pile as the sight irks me. If I can't see it then it's not my problem.

It is so warm I hardly have to dry myself, and then make my way into Adrian's room. Every night we have milk and cookies together at exactly 8:45, and he kicks me out at 9:15 on the dot. Either he reads a chapter of his book to me, I help him with his homework or we play roadblocks together. It's nice to spend time together and it gives my mom some time to settle down and get prepared for the evening ahead.

"Hey Adri, whatcha doing?" I ask as I waltz into his room and collapse onto his bed with perfectly smoothed out grey covers, making sure not to touch his pillows. He has been making his own bed since he was seven as in his mind only he can touch his sacred pillows. I used to be a bitch when he annoyed me when I was younger and sit all over them, but soon realised it isn't worth the mental breakdown.