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" 𝑰 𝒔𝒎𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 "
Potions. A lesson I purely attended because I wanted to be a auror, I was terrible at it but Draco had managed to get me up to speed last year despite everything. We were all stood listening on to Professor Slughorn introduce himself, It didn't matter though because to me all I could smell was the slight smell of Draco whenever a gush of wind or some air quickly past by I could smell his oh so familiar scent. My brother and Ron walked in late but of course the teacher let them off. Letting them join the lesson late. 'Miss Potter care to explain this potion?' Slughorn grinned at me nodding towards the middle cauldron.
'It's Amortenia' I frowned 'the most powerful love potion in the world' I muttered loud enough for him to hear. 'Yes and it smells differently according to each's person's desire or attraction.. for example Miss Potter?' He asked. I leaned forward a little and took a deep breath making my tears well up, minty breath, sweet apples, expensive cologne, smoke and a small hint of vanilla. Like my shampoo. I didn't let myself cry instead I just sighed and lied to him 'I smell nothing' My voice was monotone. I stepped back and glanced a look over to Draco who was staring intently at me. Neither of us showed emotion we just turned back to the potions.
I ended up on a table with Blaise and Pansy, Zabini had forgiven me over the summer writing so many letters saying he was sorry and that he would come round and see me but it never happened. I didn't want to, I didn't want to see anyone over the summer. 'You lied' Pansy spoke up making me raise a brow in her direction, 'huh?' She sighed setting down her ingredients 'You lied. I know you and I know when you lie, so what did you smell?' I bit my lip but looked over at Draco who was clearly listening. I flicked my eyes so Pansy understood, 'I smelt nothing P.' She nodded and we continued in silence before Blaise spoke next. 'I am sorry you lost him' I looked up. Everyone had tip toed around me about Sirius, but Blaise had just completely ignored all of that.
I looked back at him shock covering my whole face, 'I-' He just held his hand over mine and squeezed lightly. 'I am sorry I wasn't there to help because I spent all summer thinking if I was there things could have gone differently so I'm sorry' Before I could say anything my emotions were shown by my hair. It was half bright yellow and half dark blue. I smiled lightly and dipped my head. 'Nothing could be changed, but thank you Zabini' I squeezed his hand back and willed my hair to change back to which it did.
Of course my brother managed to brew the best potion although I was slightly sceptical, he wasn't doing to well last year but hey ho. I trudged out Pansy's arm linked with mine. 'You ready for charms?' I nodded and she nudged me a little 'you feeling okay' I gulped but nodded 'I've got you, so yeah' she smiled at me and we continued down the hall. Blaise and theo came up beside us. 'We good?' Theo asked cautiously but I nodded again. No point holding a grudge against someone I cared for. 'Yeah we're good' they both grinned and carried on walking. I sighed and spoke 'its not the same, it never will be. But I think we can work with it' they all knew I was referring to Draco and they all knew I was right.
Dinner. Was just as boring as it usually was, I had gone through the whole dinner not talking just smiling a little when someone said something funny. The whole Slytherin table was dull. We all knew the other houses had something against us, they thought we were the issue. Everyone was just a little bit more quiet. I was ignoring everyone until I felt it, it was only slight but it was there. A small kick on the side of my foot. I looked up and it was him, he had got my attention. He didn't say anything but we continued to play with each other's feet under the table. It wasn't much, it was like we were kids. In a way we were.
It happened again in DADA he took Pansy's seat which shocked both of us and he played with my foot under the table, for most of the lesson I stayed still and didn't play back, but it was too much by the last 10 minutes we were like we were in the great hall. I didn't want it to be like this, I wanted us to hold hands or kiss but no. I think this was his I'm sorry. It was a shitty one but it was okay I could deal with this small amount of affection because it made me think he didn't completely hate me and the break up wasn't because of us.
Blaise and I were making our way back to the common room, when he spoke up. 'Hes still in love with you' I sighed and nudged Blaise 'maybe, but not enough' Blaise shook his head. 'Its something else because I watched him go from dickhead to soft because of you, he told me and Theo he was in love with you meaning he really was because he doesn't tell us shit' I laughed but wiping some tears. We had stopped just before the door. 'He told me he loved me and I didn't say anything, he said he'd wait for me but now I feel I'm waiting for him. I always knew our opposite sides would be a problem but I thought we'd figure it out or have longer than a year.' He hummed. 'You'll find your way back to each other' I hugged him tight. 'Maybe.'
