Lovesick Chamber

11

Umalis na silang lahat at kami na lang ni Sai ang naiwan sa condo ko. He was just sitting there waiting for me to say something. Hindi siya nagtatanong. Wala din siyang ibang ginagawa. Tinitigan ko lang siya...iniisip ko ang mga sinabi ni Oliver. Ayoko sanang maniwala pero hindi maalis sa isip ko lahat ng sinabi niya. It makes sense...the part where sinadya ni Sai ang magkatabi kami ng condo...pero hindi ko lang talaga alam. Hindi ako naniniwalang lolokohin niya ako. He's not the type...pero it seemed possible for him to manipulate people especially knowing his line of work.

"May sasabihin ka ba sa akin?" I asked him out of nowhere. "May hindi ka ba sinasabi sa akin?" I changed the question. Natigilan siya at biglang tumingin sa akin.

"What do you mean?" tanong niya...confused.

"Wala...baka lang may sasabihin ka..."

"May gusto ko bang malaman? You can ask me anything. I will answer honestly." Sabi niya staring at me.

Ako naman ang natigilan.

"Let's just rest. Alam kong pagod ka from work and I am too....sa dami ba naman ng nangyari ngayon..." sabi ko sa kanya without emotions.

Tumayo siya...akala ko aalis na...biglang lumapit siya sa akin and hugged me. "I know you don't feel well...but let me just steal a hug from you...I'm having a rough day....I don't think it will get better yet..."

I hugged him back. Kawawa naman 'tong boyfriend ko... Ang hirap siguro talaga ng trabaho nila no? Sobrang hirap din kasi makipagsabayan sa takbo ng utak ng tao.

"Tell me about it..." I said. Nakayakap pa rin siya sa akin. His head tilted to rest on my shoulder.

Ramdam kong bumasa ang balikat ko. He's crying. I hugged him...this time tighter.

"My patient committed suicide..." his voice trembled...."and I'm having a really hard time dealing with Alexa"

I tapped his back trying to comfort him... I feel the weight of his emotions and I just can't focus on myself right now.

He wiped his tears and bigla siyang bumitaw...tumalikod siya sa akin and walked towards the door.

"Rest well my love. Lock the doors. Mag-ingat ka dito...if anything...I am just next door. Just call or text me..." sabi niya nang hindi lumilingon... "See you tomorrow, Tom"

Hindi kami nagkita...2 weeks. He was always checking up on me pero hindi na kami nagkita. Some days busy ako with work. We have trainings and workshops na kasi...malapit na magstart ang semester. He told me he'd be busy kasi marami siyang kailangan gawin. His case study was trashed dahil nagsuicide ang kanyang sole participant. He needs to find another person with the same case. Binigyan din siya ng deadline. They will submit the paper sa New Zealand daw kasi...

Aki was always with me. Minsan doon na siya sa condo ko natutulog minsan din dalawa sila ni Zeke. Other nights si Sir Jade and Max naman ang nag-oovernight stay. I was preoccupied and hindi na rin nagparamdam si Oliver. Nakalimutan ko na nga siya eh...

Sunday morning... I was alone in my condo. Umuwi sila Sir Jade and Max dahil may lalakarin daw sila. I also had to go out to buy some groceries. I asked Jimmy out but he went to Carcar kasi may nakita na daw silang participant for his case study. I was about to go nang pagkalabas ko sa pinto ay nakita ko si Oliver. He was clearly waiting for a chance to get in... I was starting to get scared. I started sweating and medyo nahihirapan akong makahinga. I tried so hard to calm myself. Bumalik ako sa loob ng condo at dali-daling sinarhan ito but I was too late. Nahawakan na ni Oliver ang pinto at nakapasok na siya sa loob. Tinawagan ko ang first person sa recently dialled...hindi ko pinahalata kay Oliver that I called someone.