Letter 2

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by sisi7eg

by sisi7eg

Dear A.J.J,

You remembered your birthday. But I was too prideful to send you a text. I also remember you middle name as well as your favorite color. And of course you, being you, sent me a birthday text 17 days after your own. You said you looked forward to mine more than yours.

Reminds me of Valentine's day when you asked my best friend what my favorite flower was and spent 3 plus hours on a drawing, then searched up a poem and copied it down on the paper. You also got candy, my favorite too, and put it in my locker even after our "I love you's" stopped. Because you broke up with me a week earlier. But you asked for me back and I refused.

You had many of my firsts. Like my first middle school crush. (Of course you never called it that) And you had the big flashy "First Boyfriend" title that seems faded now. You had my first kiss, please don't tell my mom. And you had my first goodbye. You broke up with me. But only because, you had caught on before it was done by me. You were so hurt that I would do such a thing. But you were more invested than me. You said I love you. And I said it back, but it was more more of a question, whispering in my head I was lying to myself. Because I didn't love you. And I know you didn't love me.

But that's how it goes if you want to be with me it seems. I can be invested, until I get bored. I guess I really have commitment issues. But there were also flaws in us as well.

You didn't know how to treat a woman, even though you told me countless times you did. You said I was pretty sure, but also liked my ass. You made inappropriate comments as if they were your language. Sure dirty jokes are funny, until you scar me for life. We went too fast. Within two three weeks we said "I love you." Within 4 we were done. You gave me anxiety to be honest, but I don't blame you for my issues, those were bound to hit soon anyway.

I miss you, I wish we could be friends, but I know that would hurt both of us in the process. We deserve better. Because you are not a piece of shit. Get it fucking right. And I'm a bitch, but hey, who says that's not my goal.

I have decided I'm better off either alone or just Friday night flings, of course those will have to wait until I'm out from under my mom's roof.....

I wish you all the best. I know you can do great things, if you just allow yourself to.

someone who hurt you but still cares,

S.E.G