Creepypasta OC Reviews (DISCONTINUED!)

Review 8- Laughter

Bold=My thoughts

Name:Laughter (name is just Laughter)

Okay.

Nickname:Miss Laugh, Laughter Hatter,

Noice.

Gender:Female

Pronouns:Her/She

Nothing wrong here.

Species:Human

Okay.

Nationality:Mexican

No problem here.

Age:??? (she is imaginary)

This doesn't make much sense since she's a real person.

Sexuality:Heterosexual (straight)

Okay.

Appearance:Rosy red hair with black tips at the bottom, one green eye on the right, and one blue eye on the right, with heart tattoo on right cheek. Mostly wears 1940s clothing since she is from those years, but will wear formal suits.

I like that it's original, but it's feels a bit odd that her hair is like that, even tho she wouldn't have been able to dye it like that in the 1940s (I think.)

Zodiac:Aries

Okay.

Height:very tall, about 6'4

She keeps reminding me of Laughing Jack.

Body type:skinny

Okay.

Weight: 121 lbs

Okay.

Backstory: Laughter came to life in 1975 in Mexico when a little boy named Jacob opened a music box given from his grandmother for his birthday and out came her. He was only 5 years and he and Laughter had fun for 7 years until his mother told Jacob that imaginary friends aren't real and that his mind was only playing games. Then, when he was 17 about 10 years later, he was with his girlfriend Katie but he never forgot about Laughter and the fun times they had. Suddenly from out of nowhere, Laughter came and killed his girlfriend leaving Jacob afraid and having nightmares about her. (I'll also add: She is actually from 1940s just that a woman trapped her in a music box.)

1) This story is a LOT like Laughing Jack. I don't know whether you meant it to do that, but they're very similar.

2) I like the fact she's a real person, although I'd like to know why she was put into the music box.

3) 5+7=12. 12+10 isn't 17. 

4) I do like the backstory, but I feel like there are things you could work on. Such as, make a reason behind why Laughter killed Katie, or why Laughter was able to escape the music box.

Mental Disorder:none.

That's good.

How they Kill:Her victims are children so she'll pretend to be a nice person to mess with them and kills them. She will also kill young adults by smashing them with her hammer or cutting them with her chainsaw.

Why tho?

Weakness:Having to be judged by someone.

I feel like there's more you can add here.

Ablities:Teleportation, Hypnosis, and cause Alice in Wonderland Syndrome to victims

Cool! What's Alice in Wonderland Syndrome?

Weapons:Hammer, Chainsaw, Shotgun

Nice weapon choices.

Fears:Being Judged, Having to be alone,Being as if she was being watched by someone

Great fears!

Significant other:none

Okay.

I love my OC!

That's great!

Final thoughts:

-I feel like you should work on the character a bit, bc they seem a lot like Laughing Jack. 

-There's a lot about this OC I love tho!

7/10