NO FUN CLUB

9

Butterflies invaded Frank's stomach.

He hadn't felt like this in quite a while, and he couldn't understand why it took him so long to kiss Gerard.

He knew it wouldn't be like his usual relationships based on sex. But maybe he was looking for something more. He still had no idea. He just knew he liked Gerard and he enjoyed being with him, and he knew that he had to forget about Victor and Oliver and Cortez, because Gerard deserved all his attention.

And to be honest, he didn't mind that.

Gerard deserved more than slutty Paco.

And probably he wasn't ready for a relationship yet, but kissing him made him forget about how shitty his life was for a moment, and he needed more of that.

On his way to the hospital, he smiled again, remembering when Gerard said he liked him too.

Aunt Jo was there when he walked in his grandfather's room, and just by her frown, Frank knew there was something wrong. 'He doesn't have a lot of time left,' she said.

And nothing else mattered.

His world crumbled in a second.

'Can I –?' Frank asked, and Aunt Jo nodded, leaving him alone with her dad.

'Hey, Pop,' he said between sobs, taking his hand and kneeling by his bed. 'Please don't leave me, okay? You have to wake up – because I – I have something very important to tell you.' He knew he wasn't listening, but he wanted to believe a part of him was still around. 'I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, but I was afraid you'd throw me away or wouldn't want to see me anymore, and that hurt more than anything. But now I know I'm too stupid because you were never like that.' He caressed the back of his hand with his thumb, wishing he was still a little kid and holding his hand to go to the park. 'And I'm sorry I never told you, and that I never brought a girl home. But that's the thing. I like boys. Always have. And I'm sorry I'm a disappointment,' he started sobbing again, having a breakdown.

He didn't even notice his aunt coming in and putting her arms around him to comfort him. 'I just want him to wake up. Please, wake up!' he cried, and Aunt Jo hugged him until he was calmer.

***

Gerard woke up with the biggest smile on his face.

He could still feel Frank's lips in his. His hand on his hip. He tasted like cigarette and stale beer, but he was also sweet. God, he wanted to kiss him again.

He remembered they kissed for the longest time. Frank said he had to practice more and that he'd teach him. Then Frank said he had to go.

He wanted to believe he wasn't going to see one of his boyfriends. He wanted to trust him, but it wasn't like they were anything. He just kissed him.

He kissed someone!

He had a guy's tongue in his mouth!

He kissed Frank!

He wanted to call Jamia and Mikey and tell them, but he also wanted to keep it himself for a while. His little secret. It wasn't like they were going to believe him.

But more than anything, he wanted to call Frank and go see him and kiss him again.

***

Frank didn't want to leave his grandfather's side, crying and kicking. His aunt had to call Frank's dad to come get him, and he drove him to his Nana's house, where the whole family was waiting for news.