Nicky Nichols one shots

Nicky on resisting drugs solo

Everything in her body was telling Nicky to have a little taste, its all she wanted to do, well, she didnt want to because shes clean and that in itself was amazing, but she has this.. theres this unquenchable, unmoving need Nicky gets, a need to just have a taste of any drug, but especially Heroin her drug of choice. She knows with one little taste, all these feelings, thoughts, they will disappear, evaporate for a while, she'll have a little bit of relief.. but with that relief she also knows after 10 years of the same struggle that it wont last and now that shes in prison and has found Red, she just knows Red will never forgive her and she'll lose the only family she has.

It isnt worth it, Nicky, though on edge so much, knows she has to stay clean. They were supposed to sell it but Nicky just couldnt let it go, she didnt want to have it, she just wanted to have it to look at, that is all because..

for now she could resist it, for now one little look was enough to give her that safe feeling, for now she doesnt have to have it, staring at it is enough, looking at each particle of the powder, opening the bag but having enough self control to not have a taste, doing this made her feel strong, at the same time god only knows how long resisting will work, resisting before it just gets too hard and that eventual inevitable taste hits her body and her whole world comes crashing down.