Simp for me.

Emma's Will

I shoved my head into my pillow, screaming angrily. It lasted for a few seconds before I pulled my head away and let out a sigh, my breathing was quiet, today was hard. I needed a self-care day, but I was so frustrated and upset that I couldn't focus on myself enough to do anything beneficial.

A bad habit I have, I bite the skin off my lips, bite my tongue until it bleeds, I try to keep myself from doing it, but I could already feel that today was gonna be bad for my lips. I can't stop myself, it's been a habit for years, I do it when I'm anxious or panicking.

I laid in my bed, my eyes focused on the ceiling. I didn't want to use energy to look away, I didn't have any to use anyway. I haven't talked to anyone today, it was nearing 2pm, I still hadn't even gotten out of bed.

I heard my phone ringing, but they would go unanswered while I tried to get myself together. It's always okay to take time for yourself, take all the time you need. It's all I'm doing to remind myself that I will be okay.

Sean
Stream today? Short notice I know, starts at 8pm, you in?

I left the message opened, luckily I don't have my read receipts on, I always feel bad when people think I'm ignoring them. I knew I would eventually work up the motivation to message him back, but for right now I would have to take some time away.

"@SydSweet:
Hiii guys, I'm taking a day away, I love you and I'm so thankful for your constant support. Thank you for baring with me while I figure some stuff out. You own my whole heart <3"

I sent the tweet and hoped it would reach everyone who had messaged me and it went unanswered. I knew they would worry, but my close friends know my tendencies, so I knew they would understand a bit better than everyone else.

I spend most of my bad days in my bed, today I was determined to do different. I don't always have this desire to try to fix it, but today I wanted to and I wasn't gonna let that slip through the cracks.

It took me a few hours to actually get up, don't get me wrong, this isn't how my bad days go, I don't get up. I spend the whole time just laying in silence, even the slightest voice is too overstimulating, but today I had to be different, I had to push.

My therapist recommends I do at least two activities, at least 10 minutes each, every bad day. Whether it's cleaning the kitchen, taking a shower, just doing breathing exercises, any 10 minute activity. Today, I decided to take a shower, no sitting down, and clean the balcony so I could feel some sunlight on my skin.

Sean
You got this, I love you, call me if you need me

I smiled at the message and nodded to myself, repeating 'Call him if you need him' I was thinking of taking him up on that offer. It might come to that later today, for right now it was time to take a shower.

I took all the time I wanted, exfoliating my whole body, I really romanticized that shower. I needed to spend today loving myself, and if taking an hour long shower was how I start, then that's my business.

"Syd! Phone!" I huffed and stepped out of the shower, jogging around the house to him. I was getting water everywhere, but if I was getting a call on his phone, that must mean business.

"Hello, Mrs. Sweet?" I nodded at the phone, soon realizing he couldn't see me, and introduced myself formally, 'Sydney Sweet, yes Sir.'

"I'm the Robbins family lawyer, William Morgan, I was told to speak with you on behalf of the family." I took a deep breath, it caught in my throat as Henry looked at me with wide eyes, why didn't Emma's family just call me on their own?