Simp for me.

The Letters.

"Do you want to take your backpack?" I was here, but I wasn't here. My mind was somewhere else, so today Sean and Henry knew they had to take charge and be the deciders for us all.

"Yes." I nodded, watching him grab my little backpack for me. I keep it instead of a purse, it's just more convenient to carry around, so I like it better.

He carried it, my hands laced together with my fingernails digging into my palms. My tongue and lips weren't doing very well, I had bitten all the skin off and was left with ugly, raw, painful spots.

I don't know how to describe the way I was feeling, but I also dissociated the whole thing, so I can't really describe anything about it, but I try my best.

We arrived at the lawyers office an hour in advance, giving us enough time to sit in the car and wait. I already had tears in my eyes, Sean's were glazed over, and Henry was already crying.

The gang was back together again, but we were missing a key person. We were missing our fourth. We could never replace her, for the rest of time, it will be us 3.

"Ready?" I followed behind them anyway, my head screaming to have stayed in the car, to have stayed at home. I didn't want to be here.

"Sydni!" I heard someone shout, my head jerking up to find Emma's mom looking at me with tear-filled eyes. She always refused to call me Syd, not sure why.

"Hi, Mrs. Robbins." My voice was quiet, a voice crack filled the room, obvious that I had been and was going to continue crying.

"I would've called you personally, but I wasn't allowed to. Emma specified that." I nodded. Her hand slowly slipped into mine, her husband soon finding his way over to us as we sat down in the waiting room.

It wasn't long before we were all called back, their lawyer was as intimidating and terrifying as he sounded on the phone. I still felt like I couldn't breathe, I was here and finally about to learn what Emma wanted.

"Emma left letters to all of you, she specified that you weren't allowed to have them until now, here they are." I looked at the letters he had slid to us, my name clear on the paper a happy "<3 Syd <3" was written on the envelope.

"You can choose whether or not to read them, there is also one addressed to all 3 of you." He slid another one across the table, this one was different. The envelope was different, a small 'Dream Team' written on top, that's what she referred to us as since we all managed to stay friends so well but have hardly any friends outside of the 4 of us.

"Are we allowed to read that one first?" I heard Sean ask, my mind didn't even just to that, but he nodded anyway, Sean looked at the rest of us to make sure. I agreed, my mind wasn't going to pay attention anyway.

"Dear my dream team,

So it's almost been a year huh? I always wondered how your lives would be. I knew Sean would keep doing youtube, hopefully he has a girlfriend now haha. Syd would keep streaming, hopefully finding her partner, I know she'll end up with someone. Keep your head up baby. Henry, how's Abby? Keep her around. She's the one.

So you're probably wandering why I brought you all back here a year later. It's just to show the power I still have over you, I brought you all back to this one room, I'm sure Sean flew early to help Syd, so you had to spend more time together. Stop letting the distance stop you, you can visit each other, you can hang out without me, don't worry about it. I want you to.

I left letters addressed to you all, but I know you'll read this one first, I'm sure Sean is reading it out loud to all of you too. Henry, I haven't forgotten about you buddy, your letter says a lot, please keep it.