Before You Leave

35. New Years

Aria and I looked at our work. We had to be on decorating committee, which was a pain in the ass. She was on it for fun, but this was my detention for being late to class the other day.

It was New Years Eve, so we finally finished the New Years decorations in the quad. We didn't do it alone, of course. Mya helped and so did Corey, but they didn't talk to us much. And if they did, it was really just directed to Aria.

I guess people didn't like me very much here after Gideon punched Samuel and I was pretty much a bitch to everyone I first encountered here...

Camryn would also help from time to time, but she mainly just talked to Corey.

They were happy and laughing and all giddy most of the time.

I hated it.

Why couldn't Gideon and I be like that again? I huffed as I looked over at Aria. I'm lying to him, that's why we can't be like that.

"Finally got your ass done," she says. "The party's in five minutes."

"It still looks like crap," I groan. And it did. My banner was crooked, the balloons were too small, and it didn't fit in with the rest of the decorations.

"Who cares." She shrugged.

"You got a date tonight?" I ask her.

She smirked. "That's classified."

"Aria—"

"Fine. I've been seeing Ray."

I think my jaw went slack. "Shit. Like Ray? Ray, Ray? Ian's playboy brother Ray? Are we talking about the same Ray?"

"Ever since we went to that dumb party," Aria tells me, smiling a little. "While you all were playing dumb party games, we were upstairs—"

"I think I've heard enough," I interrupt, cupping my ears. "I so do not want to hear about how you and Ray hooked up," I mumble.

She rolled her eyes as she sat down on a bench. I followed and plopped next to her.

"I've noticed Gideon isn't his happy self. What's all that about?"

"Don't tell him, but I've been lying to him. Like, a lot," I confide, my chest feeling instantly lighter as I admitted it. "My partner for the ice skating tournament is this foreign exchange student from Russia. Anyways," I sigh crossing my legs, "my coach made the two of us spend some time together to work on our intimacy and trust and all that shit," I explain. "And I just don't want Gideon to freak out, but I know he will."

"I get why you don't want to tell him," she says. "But you need to. If you love him, you can't hurt him. Not like that."

"I will tell him." I brush some hair out of my eyes. "I'm just going to do it after the tournament. Plus, I don't think he'll go anyway. He's still a little angry at me."

Aria tossed her curled golden brown hair behind her shoulder. "And how do you feel about this Russian student?"

I laughed. "Alexei? He's not even my friend."

"Is he more?"

I whipped my head to hers. I checked her face for any source of amusement, but there was none. "You can't be serious. I love Gideon!"

"That's not what I asked."

I rolled my eyes. "He's in college. And he's annoying. And mediocre. At best," I add, feeling the need to go on.

"You're so full of shit," she snickers. "You and Gideon are made for each other, Jen. Are you seriously going to ruin it for someone who is going back to Russia in a year?"

"First off, he's moving here, and second off, there is nothing go on between Alexei and me."

"I'm just saying, nothing can compare to you and Gideon."

"Yeah, well maybe you're wrong," I say quietly, blinking at my own realization. I take a deep breath and shake my head. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom real quick," I squeak out.

I bolted for the bathroom, my throat closing up as I slammed the stall door behind me. I heard myself wheeze, as if my windpipe was being crushed.

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I sniffed, putting my eyes in my palms. I was so dramatic.

I was confused. I didn't like Alexei. I couldn't. I was in love with Gideon. Of course I loved him.

When I looked decent, I got a few paper towels and wiped my eyes a few times to make sure before exiting the bathroom.

People were scattered across the quad, but Gideon stood out as he stood awkwardly in the corner.

I made my way to him and threaded my fingers into his. "Where'd you go? I thought you'd be early."

I looked down at my phone to see the time. I was thirty minutes late to a party I helped decorate all because I couldn't stop crying.

"I think I just had a bad dinner," I lie. "I was feeling a little sick so I went to the bathroom."

"I forgot," he says, holding up his left hand. On his ring finger lay a silver ring. "Thank you. For the present. I love it. But something's not right."

I raised my eyebrows. "What?"

"You didn't take the other one."

I smiled a small smile as he took his other hand to his back pocket and pulled out a smaller ring that looked identical to his. He slipped it on my left ring finger. Our promise rings.

"We got ten minutes until midnight," he tells me, holding out his hand. "So, would you dance with me?"

I smiled, putting my phone in my back pocket and sliding my hand in his. "If I have to," I teased as he pulled me into the grass, where everyone was dancing.

I rested my head on his chest as I reached my hands up and wrapped them around his neck. He put his hands on the middle of my back and I sighed. I was supposed to preform a piece on intimacy, yet my boyfriend struggled with it in our relationship.

We danced to about three songs, but when we were getting ready for the fourth, but the countdown started.

Ten.

I smiled up at Gideon.

Nine.

He smiled down at me.

Eight.

Seven.

Six.

Five.

Four.

He leaned down.

Three.

I pushed up on my toes.

Two.

Our lips were an inch away.

One.

And our lips locked, filling us with momentary bliss as people screamed 'HAPPY NEW YEAR' near us.

If only we knew what was going to happen the next day, I wonder, would have he spent this time with me? Danced with me? Kissed me for the last time?

I doubt it.