Before You Leave

Epilogue

That was the last night I saw Gideon. After I broke down at my fathers house the day after, I was sent to another school. It was near Birchwood, but I couldn't go back in that school and see Gideon.

I had movers get my stuff and I moved into a boarding school in the same city.

I made a few friends, who knew about some of my past, but didn't care. But they didn't know why I grew sad sometimes, or lonely, or distant. But I knew it was because I had no Gideon and I separated from Alexei.

Alexei has tried calling me and texting me for several months, but he gave up by April. I missed him, surprisingly, but if I allowed myself to see him again, it felt like I was betraying Gideon all over again.

I finished school there, and actually received a few scholarships for ice skating, and a few for my new academics. Those weren't as good as the ice skating scholarships, however.

Ms. Birchwood kept up her end of the bargain, even after I moved away. My criminal record was clean and she told me she could still get me into Dartmouth, but I took the opportunity of losing Gideon to go to the school I wanted, not him.

I chose wisely and somewhere far from here— in Washington.

I chose Washington State University, a place I got a partial scholarship to. I got a dorm and everything and was set to go.

Only one of my friends from my new school was going to the same place— Reyna Parks. And Cameron was coming, too.

But no Aria. Aria was going to California for some college. She still saw Ray from time to time, but they decided their relationship was casual.

Ian was held back, but I didn't worry about it too much.

The only things I worried about were the holes in my chest, and the boys who filled them. One who would still talk to me, and one who wouldn't.

I didn't deserve either of them. Gideon realized that and left. Alexei— not so much.

Nothing was to replace the pain I felt in my heart. It was my self-condoned punishment.

I'm convinced I will never love again.

I suppose I deserve it.