chills. | cody bellinger

[ thirty-three : real life ]

no one ever said pregnancy was easy, but in hindsight cody has made it just that.

he may not be here through all the morning sickness, or every kick but when he is, he's the sweetest and most helpful he's ever been.

i really couldn't have asked for a better human being to make another human being with. i just really hope that the baby is as much like him as possible.

not that i don't want them to be like me, or be whoever they want to be but if they have any ounce of anything from either of us i want it to be cody's kindness.

he's been away on different series and it's been a little difficult being the only person not out there cheering him and the guys on.

mady has been making it a little easier by facetiming me during games and just letting me vent when i need it. emmy has been coming over as often as possible and making sure i have everything i need.

but if anything, im just itching to be back on the field. my whole life thats all i've ever wanted, and right now i don't know how i'm even functioning without it.

i guess it's because i'm still able to do my job from home. an extreme luxury that most don't get to have. i stay up to date by keeping in touch with my partners, the broadcasting teams, and of course, the team itself. virtual interviews, phone interviews, and multiple e-mails to make sure i get how everyone is feeling after big wins and tough losses.

my star player, corey, is what i'm most looking for during these interviews. how's he feeling, what's the vibe out on the field, and how is he feeling about his ability to lead this team to a championship?

all my deets are written down on my notepad as the little human inside me continues to grow and kick mommy's bladder. i swear i haven't gone a single day without peeing less than 30-40 times. luckily cody got me a massive hydro-flask that i carry around everywhere around our house.

ashli has been over a few times to keep me company and she's been such a massive help around the house while i'm vomiting my insides out into the toilet.

there's so much going on around lately that sometimes i forget that cody can come home at any second and find me a complete utter mess. i wish he could be around more, but then again, the moments i do get to see him are what i cherish the most. it always brings me so much joy when he sees how big my belly gets every time he comes home from away games.

it makes everything so much more special.