Fighter's for life (wonwoo)

38. Xiu

Y/n point of view:
I need this talk with someone outside school and home. Lei is a very casual person and a good listener. Ever since kuro and Yuri started to date I felt like kuro needed to be with Yuri and I didn’t say all my messed-up thoughts and feelings to him.

That’s why I am so calm and comfortable with lei and told him everything. I don’t say specific who and why, but he understands and cares. Lei never tell me anything about his life. I ask and he replies its nothing special. He said he was pansexual and nothing more.

Nothing about family, friends, home or love life. He is a very closed book, but I respect his choice. When he wants to tell me then I am here waiting. Its started to get windy with a cold breeze. I ran from home without a jacket or even keys since wonwoo was home.

Now I am wondering if he is safe home or out getting drunk. It hurts, now I can be honest. No one is here to judge me, it hurts in every inch of my body. I feel like collapsing, breaking and falling apart. I feel guilty, disgusted and angry by myself.

I am jealous and it makes me feel awful. I wish Xiu just ran away or got hit by a car. I want my man to be with me and no one else. I am broken on the floor and keep asking it for more. What did I do wrong? Was it wrong to fall in love?

Was it wrong falling for wonwoo? I wish I could say I am happy for them, but I felt so much with him that I feel nothing at this point. Tears keep falling on by one and it wont stop.

Nose is leaking and my mouth is frozen. Even if everyone is here why do I feel like I am alone? Do I need alone time or is there something I am missing? I am feeling so small in this giant world. I know nothing at all.

Back home:

Me: *rings on the door*
Wonwoo: *opens the door* Y/n, its so late. Why didn’t you get back earlier?
Me: I spent some time with Lei, I need to get someone *looks at him* out of my head *walks inside*
Wonwoo: wait Y/-
Me: XIU?!
Xiu: you are?
Wonwoo: I was going to say your parents said it was alright that Xiu stayed her for a while until her parents get home
Me:(I hate you so much, but I love you too much!) I am not the owner of the house
Wonwoo: if it fine by you? *grabs my arm*

His hands were so warm like hot chocolate. So soft and tense touch that got my heart beating so fast for no reason. Theses eyes of his that fill me up with butterflies.

The moment I want to last forever, just me and him in this whole world. Even sometimes its alright with family. What was I thinking? He has a girlfriend and she is right Infront of me. Get back to sense Y/n!