The White Peacock (A Draco Malfoy Fanfic)

Chapter 30: Coward

Draco's POV

I burst into the room of requirement fall on to my knees and begin to sob, I couldn't believe what I had just done, but I was getting desperate, the cabinet was no close to being fixed and I knew the dark lord would be getting impatient.

The thought of my plan succeeding and reaching Dumbledore made me sick, what if it worked, what if I killed him, I thought, hitting my fists down on the ground. If I succeeded, if I was the one to kill the great Albus Dumbledore people would go on to remember me for years, I would be a legend.

Is this the fucking legacy I'm leaving behind, is this what I want to be remembered for? I didn't even care about the old oaf Dumbledore, he represented everything me and my family hated about the wizarding world, he is the reason we allow filthy mud bloods into this god forsaken school. Yet I didn't want him to die, or at least I didn't want to kill him, I didn't want to kill any one I thought as I continued to sob.

I suddenly realised I wasn't the chosen one, I wasn't doing this because I wanted to fight for my side of the war, I was doing this because I was scared. My thoughts get interrupted as the door bursts opens. It's Snape.

"What have you done" he growls.

"It worked? Dumbledore he is... is he dead?" I say in disbelief.

"No, the girl you had stupidly cursed, opened it before it reached him, do you have any idea how reckless this was" Snape growls grabbing me by the collar. His expression was not cold it was full of concern.

"Katie, did she die instead!?" I exclaim.

"No, well we don't know yet, she was thankfully brought back to the castle in time, we will have to wait and see what happens, how could you take a risk like this or better yet how could you think a charm like that would work on the most powerful wizard" Snape shouts

"I had no choice I was desperate" I growl.

"what if someone saw you with her!?" he growls. "I made an unbreakable vow to protect you and you are not making it easy for me" he says looking pained.

"I will be more careful" I say back coldly.

"You better" he says sternly before leaving me. I was furious at how he spoke to me, he was supposed to be working for me, yet here he was treating me like a stupid child.

I couldn't help feel remorseful at what I had done to Katie, an innocent half blood who had just been collateral damage, without thinking I found myself wondering towards the hospital wing, I needed to see the damage I had caused, I needed to face my actions. Turning around the corner frantically without looking, I accidentally knock into someone causing them to fall over.

It was my white peacock.

I drop down to help her up. "are you okay?" I ask pushing her messy dark hair out of her face

"I'm fine" she says coldly pushing me off her and getting up as she dusts herself off.

"What are you doing here?" I growl

"I have been with Katie in the hospital wing, she was cursed at the three broomsticks" she says coldly. My face dropped hearing this.

"According to Ellie, she left the bathroom with a package, the same package that cursed her, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that" she says beginning to choke up

"How would I?" I say looking down

"Because I was there! I saw you leave the bathroom at the three broomsticks! Why her? Why Katie? She is just a student!" she screams loudly with tears running down her cheeks.

"Keep your voice down" I growl looking around to see if anyone was there.

"Tell me it's not true Draco" she says looking at me as though she was scared. Her words hurt, yet it made me angry, who did she think she was judging me with those big brown eyes.

"I don't need to explain anything to you" I say coldly.

"Yes you do, you owe me the truth, it's the least you can do after everything we have been through" she says assertively

"Stop acting like you have control over me, as though I care about what you think of me, you are nothing more than a distraction from my fucked up life" I scream, catching her off-guard.

"Malfoy, I need to know what it is you are doing here at this school" she says gently

"Why? So you can go run along and tell your precious Potter all about it or better yet that sad excuse for a headmaster" I growl

"I have known for 2 months that you are a death eater, and I chose to protect you, because after everything I somehow just know there is good in you, I know you wouldn't hurt someone unless you really didn't have a choice, I may not understand it but I want you to try and make me understand" she says sympathetically

"why would I bother making you understand? why should I care about what a mudblood thinks about me?" I growl

"I'm so sick of this stupid game you keep playing, the one where you give me the slightest hope that you are a decent person then you turn around and push me away, and then you justify it by thinking you are protecting me" she cries. "well guess what no matter what you do, you will never be able to protect me, not when you are a death eater" she growls

"Then leave! Stay away from me!" I shout. She stares back at me looking disappointed and begins to turn away but stops and turns back.

"You are a coward Draco Malfoy, you were a coward that night of the tri wizard tournament and a coward when you became a death eater, you always will be a coward until you start owning your actions and your feelings" she shouts and I don't want to be with a coward" She says coldly before walking away.

Her words were like a knife going through me. She made me I realise my actions were going to create a world that she couldn't be safe in. I always knew this, yet I never let myself think about it until now. Replaying her big brown eyes staring back at me I realised in order to take care of my family, to hold up the Malfoy name I would have to pay a price, and she was the price I was paying.