Hope And Faith ✓

3. Hope

Author: What is one thing you would tell everyone in the world if you had the chance?

Faith: It doesn't matter what you've been through or how painful it was, all that matters is that you keep your head hung high. That's the only way we can survive in this cruel world.

~Faith Jennings

••

I could state a million and one reasons why crying was a solution.

As depressing as that sounded, it was. I hadn't cried in years, six years to be precise. The last time I had cried was when Mom and Dad were getting a divorce.

And when Lacey was put into the picture.

But now my reasons to cry were overwhelming, I was so used to smiling and making everyone that cried smile that it almost felt odd to me.

No one was picking up my calls. Not Sabrina, not Jessica, not Liv and not Georgia. I had tried calling Lacey but she was stuck at a meeting and had promised to call me back. And I couldn't find my half brother, Garrett.

I had no idea where he was and it was driving me crazy, the last time I saw him was yesterday when he was threatening Jacob with a butter knife.

I had even called his girlfriend Casey and I hadn't gotten my desired response.

For the first time in my life, I felt alone, there was no one there, my friends weren't picking up my calls, my Stepmom was busy and my brother was nowhere to be found.

I had all the reasons in the world to cry. I could remember that glimmer of hope I got when I remembered I could call Jacob, but then after what I remembered yesterday for the fifth time that day I chickened out and cried even harder. My boyfriend wasn't and had never been there for me. I was just a time-kill and I never thought it would hurt me as much as it did.

Calling Dad was an option thrown out of the window, I knew he would be fast asleep, he had been working for days and only just got back.

Mom. . . I missed her. I should have called her, I knew she'd pick up at the first ring but I couldn't.

How could you tell your mother, the social butterfly, your inspiration, the woman that was always surrounded by people that genuinely cared about her that you were alone? And that your half brother wasn't there like he always was?

I couldn't bring myself to do it.

So when I saw a familiar pair of green eyes glaring at me I wasn't sure how to act. I should have felt violated, upset and even angry but I didn't.

I felt like a little kid getting lectured about why stealing is wrong.

The moment my eyes met hers I knew her sudden anger and frustration wasn't at me. She looked upset, disturbed and her green eyes looked like they had a turmoil of negative emotions going through them.

But I didn't care about any of that. She could shout at me, scream at me. I would rather have her, a total stranger, lecture me for hours than feel this loneliness again.

So I wiped my tears with my hands as quickly as I could, almost like she'd disappear if I wasn't quick enough. I blinked and looked up at her, again.

She looked tense and for a moment - confused. Like she didn't know what she was doing. Her wavy platinum blonde hair looked a few shades lighter under the sun, her olive skin seemed to shine but I didn't miss her eyes that rimmed red.