Her Ex

chapter 1- No sleep

I rolled over on the right side of my large and soft mattress and wrapped the blanket closer to my body.

I had just suffered through another nightmare. Sadly that nightmare is only a terryfing memory.

A memory I've tried so hard to push behind in the dark depths of my mind to never think about again. Anything to just forget.

Alcohol and weed couldn't even help.
Nothing seems to help.

And the fucked up thing about this is I have work in 3 hours.

My life is a mess. It always has been. I just wish my sleep wasn't included in this big disaster.

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I have not fallen asleep yet, my nerves are on high alert. Everytime I close my eyes I see him. His hands. I can still hear his degrading words.

I have work in 1 hour. Sleep is needed. But sleep seems to not need me. Insomnia loves me... especially when I really don't need her here with me.

I might as well take a shower, brush my teeth and pick out a decent work outfit.

There's no point for me to just lay here bored with my life. When I could be doing something productive and somewhat responsible.

I'm a little mad that the pharmacy ran out of my sleep meds.

Without that drug, sleep seems impossible.

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I gaze into the mirror...I force a smile onto my lips. My smile drops. Smiling is rare for me now. Happiness is rare as well.

I don't mean to come off as some sad, lonely, depressed women...but I can't help.

I've tried to fake being happy until I convince myself to be happy.

But what even is happiness?

There are so many definitions to happiness?

Which happiness do I want the most?

What will truly make me...happy?

You see, I already have an answer for that.

Freedom.

Freedom will bring me the most happiness I can ever have.

But I'll never be free. I'm trapped inside the gates of hell on earth, until I die.

I was once a happy, bright young girl. But he ruined it. He ruined all of it. He ruined me.

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" Ms.Blackwood, Mr.Myers would like for you to see him in his office. He said it's urgent."

I look up from my computer. I press the save button on my computer and leave my small office.

My heels click on the shiny, glossy floor as I walk down the hall.

I knock on his large office door before entering.

I hear his deep voice say...

" Come in."

I open the door and he sets his black coffee mug down on the crimson red coaster and looks at me as I stand by the closed door.

" Please. Come sit down. I have something to discuss with you."

Am I in trouble? I hope not.

I need this job.

" Ms.Blackwood, you're not in trouble. Don't worry about that. But I need to ask you for a favor?."

I sigh in relief and say.

" Thank goodness. And please let me know what you need for me to do?."

He smiled at me...I faked a smile back.

" Well. Some business people want to partner up with me. If we do a good enough job in impressing them...Our company and their company will align together and our business will have more recognition and more costumers will line up at our door."

I think for a few seconds then say.

" That sounds great, but why am I needed to be there? Sorry for stepping out of line and questioning your methods, but I'd like to know."

" Ms.Blackwood, do not be sorry. You're allowed to have questions and freely ask them as you wish...I need you there for back up ideas and suggestions... You're a bright girl. They will be very impressed by your responses."

I almost smile at David's kind words...I'm happy one person finally appreciates me for my smarts and personallity, instead of my beauty.

I know it's nice for someone to call you beautiful, but it's even nice to be appreciated for being intelligent and for having a great personality.

I don't want someone to just think that I'm a pretty face and only focussing on that, instead of what really matters.

" Yeah. Sure. I'd go with you, but is it a formal Wear type of thing or casual and formal."

He drinks his unsweetened black coffee and says...

" It's formal. But you can wear whatever you'd like... It's tommorow after work. I give you the day off and at 4:30 p.m. I need you to arrive at the restaurant 'Le Bernardin' ".

" Ok, Mr.Myers, I will go with you. Thank you for asking me."

" No problem. You are free to leave now...Thank you for coming with me."

I nod my head as I shut the door and walk back to my little office.

I begin typing the next paragraph of the paper work.

I yawn as I start becoming tired from the lack of sleep. Today is going to be a long, tiring day.

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