It Was Always You - Professor Remus J. Lupin x OC

PART III -- PAIN

You couldn’t wait to be graduated from Hogwarts. Not that you didn’t love it here, on the contrary, you love Hogwarts more than anything in the world. You just couldn’t wait to be graduated, take the teachers exams, and be a Professor in your own home.

And what more exciting is, Professor Dumbledore announced at the Sorting Hat Ceremony earlier today, that some alumni from previous graduates would be in Hogwarts to attend some matters. You knew that you had to meet them. You had to meet them because you wanted to learn from their bravery, their level of magic, their ambitions, their stories.

While most students were practically attracted to the one and only Sirius Orion Black, you had eyes on the calmer alumnus, Remus John Lupin. He stepped back a couple of steps when the crowd was overcrowding Sirius. He could only chuckle because he knew that it’s in his best friend’s blood to be attractive beyond words. You slowly walked towards Remus.

“Hi, Remus isn’t it?”

“Oh, hello, yes.”

“Hi, I’m Lucille Silverside.” You shook his hand

“Ah, you’re Hugo and Theo Silverside’s little sister. Pleased to meet you, Lucille.”

“You know, this crowd is never coming to an end. After all, you must’ve known your own best friend.”

“Exactly.” He laughed and shook his head

“Do you mind to teach me a little bit about Patronus, Sir? I’m having a little bit trouble.”

“As long as you didn’t call me Sir, it would be my pleasure.” That was the beginning of it. The beginning of a friendship that would take a twist unbeknownst to you.


You learnt a lot from Remus Lupin. He turned out to be a person with a very excellent sense of humor once he opened up. He’s also a particularly gifted duelist and very perceptive towards his surroundings. And the thing you liked the most is, every after lesson you learned, he never missed to provide you with a piece of chocolate. He just seemed to have a plenty of stock in his pockets. You knew actually he’s saving it for himself during full moons, but he never mind sharing it with anyone he sees having a bad day.

During your last year in Hogwarts, you’ve grown close to Remus more than anyone else. Even though you both are almost nine years apart, you had no trouble understanding each other. You seemed to be connected in the same length of energy. You love the way he taught everything he knew to help you becoming a Professor, his quirks, his favorite chocolate bar, his stories back in his Hogwarts days, his crooked smile, and his eyes… his eyes were the most captivating part of him. He told you that you’re as clumsy as a frog (you thought it’s a weird analogy but whatever), you’re jumpy and hate to admit it, you’re a fast learner and he loved mentoring you.


“Remus, may I ask you something?” after one particular day, you both took a stroll in the forest.

“Most certainly.”

“How do you survive loneliness?” you both stopped by the lake and took a sit. It’s always been soothing to watch the surface of the lake shunned by the sun rays. The wind blew as you nibble a piece of chocolate Remus gave earlier

“To be frankly honest, I didn’t know how. Why did you ask such question, Lu?”

“I know that you understand the feeling of being misunderstood.” You glanced at him as he sat silently and stared at the lake.

“You could say I’m glad that James, Sirius and Peter came into my life. They’ve helped me becoming the person I am today.”

“I’m glad for you too.”

“Didn’t you have many friends here?”

“They are acquaintances, yes, but what I’m talking about was the connection. Not just someone who talked about boyfriends or girlfriends, or complaining about how hard the lessons were, or afraid they’d fail the tests, or how bad the weather is. You know, the connection.” You gestured your hand into an irregular shape and pulled it close to your heart

“I see.” He paused and touched his slightly growing beard

“I think, the key is knowing who you are. If you understand what you want, where do you want to go, what are you trying to achieve, then you won’t feel alone. Because not knowing who you are is the loneliest feeling.” He smiled sincerely towards you. Took you both a couple of minutes to let go of each other’s glances.