My One And Only Poison (18+)-undergoing major editing.

45

" home sweet home, "I said as I stepped inside the house.It  seemed as if it had been ages since I had been in this house. Nothing changed though it was still the same,  yet I felt different,  before I felt like a prisoner ,as if I didn't belong here an imposter . now , I didn't feel trapped, I felt light , I don't know how to explain it, but I felt like something would be different this time. I hoped it would be different this time.

Maybe I was being delusional,  maybe I dreamed too much. I still felt like I could have it, I could have happily ever after. It was stupid, in this life that seemed impossible. I wanted too much. " are you alright baby girl." Xav said pulling me out of my thoughts.

" I'm ok."I said as I stared at the walls. Would they cage me in as they did before. Should I trust xav , would I make it out alive this time. ok ,I should really  I'm spending so much time in my head ,that wasn't at all healthy.

I walked up up the stairs, it was going to be different this time, I told myself. In my heart I knew that nothing much would change,  I just hoped. For the first time ever I was putting my  trust in xavier , ok maybe not the first time but I felt different this time.

" I'm going to go out on some business, I'll be back soon."xav, said. "Where are you going. " I asked." I can't tell you."he said, " oh" I said looking down , I felt disappointed , I always expect xav to be something  he is not,  I needed to face the fact that he wouldn't change.  "Do you trust me , babygirl" Xav asked ,touching my face."yes " I said , I did and I knew I would regret it later. I stared into his eyes those blue pools that enchanted me. I analyzed his face, he pulled me in. He was addictive and I was addicted. I kissed him, I couldn't resist.

He held on to me so tightly,  I ran my hands through his hair. I always get lost in these kisses.
" I've got to go, get some sleep ,you must be tired. "he said, and just like that he was gone.
I sighed, xavier Salvatore, he was my poison, my guilty pleasure.

His toxicity I craved, he was bad for me, and I knew it ,I wanted him though, I wanted him so much. I went into the bathroom.  I looked in the mirror,  Victoria sanders, the girl I used to be , she in there somewhere. I wondered if xav would consider letting me go back to school , I knew he would refuse but maybe I could change his mind. I could deal with a few bodyguards here and there I guess,  a change of scenery and the chance to continue my studies and meet new people sounded great.

I wanted her back, the naïve innocent girl, I hoped that maybe I could go back to that time of my life. It seemed impossible though, so much had changed. I wasn't giving him a chance. Believe I was going to give him a change,  I just felt like I needed a me, I've been too focused on xav lately. I lost myself in him .I wanted me away more than I wanted him. I had to give me a chance to heal , a chance to discover who I am and who I can be.

I walked out the bathroom, I sat on the bed.
I wondered what harry was doing, maybe I could call him, no I couldn't do that,  I mean one call wouldn't hurt , .I picked up the phone " hello ." Harry said answering the phone.
," Hi" I said, " who is this. " harry, shit I thought,  I haven't been gone that long. "I'm kidding,  how are little one. " He said. " I'm ok harry, how are you." I said ." I'm ok, sweetheart,  but I would've been much better. If you had told me you were leaving. " harry said. " oh well, I had some family problems back home, I had to leave. " I said. " oh , what kind of family problems." Harry asked." The usual." I said laughing.

" oh , well I'll miss you little one, I know you'll miss me too,  I mean who wouldn't
." Harry said. " sure let's go with that." I said.

" well I've got to go, I'll talk to you later,  I have some family problems of my one to take care of. " He said. " ok bye . " I said. " wait, I just wanted to say I'll miss you and__" "I'll miss you too harry." I said. " no , that's, what I'm trying to say is that I like you Victoria,  I like you very much , I just wanted to tell you before I chicken out, you make me so nervous. I just care about you and I want you to know,  you don't have to say anything, back I completely understand if you don't feel the same way I do."  He said. " I. .. I don't what to say ,I like you too harry." I stuttered.