He's Not Gay

Chapter 27: Toledo

“One month, Cara, one month!” frustrated, Chezca uttered on the screen of my phone.

“Come on, mumsh, it's been just a month—”

“Oh, no, it's been a fucking month long! Isn't that enough?! What the fucking hell are you doing there? And where the hell is that place?!”

I laughed at her attitude. She's acting like Iris. Wow, she is mad, indeed. I wonder if she'll get madder after knowing that I'll be out of the country by this afternoon.

“There's no point of you knowing,” I chuckled the words. “Besides, aalis na rin naman ako maya-maya lang. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get ready for my flight—”

“No!” she yelled like she's ready to get out of the screen. “You are not going anywhere! Ano ba talagang binabalak mo? Saan ka naman pupunta? Cara, ano ka ba?! Get back here in Manila! Hindi mo ba puwedeng isipin 'yang batang nasa sinapupunan mo?! Si Aaron, tatakasan mo talaga siya? Parang baliktad, ang nabuntis ang tumatakbo, hindi ang nakabuntis. You are unbelievable,” she said out of disappointment.

Napapikit ako at napabuntong-hininga matapos marinig ang sinabi niya. She's right, but how ironic things may have been, I've made up my mind and my decisions are final. For the past month that I have been away from all of the people whom I know, I've had peace. Being away from them make my breathing back to its befitting pace. Little by little, I'm coping, I'm healing, and just a little more, I'll be complete. Who knows, maybe after another more month or two, I'll be back. Just let me go.

“Franchezca,” I called her as I opened my eyes. “Thank you for concerning yourself over me, but please, do not worry, don't think too much. I'm okay and I will always be.”

“You seriously think that I'll believe you?! I can never be certain about whatever is happening to you until—”

Hayyy! Seriously, last na 'to, hindi ko na muna sasagutin pang muli ang calls and messages na manggagaling sa kaniya. Totoong titiisin ko na muna siya.

“I'll see you when I see you,” I said, giving her a smiling face.

“What do you mean? Hey! Cara?!”

“Love you so much, mumsh,” I said before ending the video call.

I turned my phone off and then sigh. I feel bad for them, for her. Chezca has been doing everything for all of us, she's the greatest best friend ever. Kahit noong mga panahong malayo siya, hindi siya nagkulang sa aming magkakaibigan. Sana, kadugo ko na lang siya at namana ko ang good mindset and maturity niya in terms of right and wrongdoings in life. I get that nobody is perfect, but Franchezca, she is not far from being one. I know that she's right, mali itong gagawin ko, mali ang tumakas ako, pero kailangan kong gawin ito para sa sarili ko.

I left the house that I rented for a month here in Laguna and drive smoothly to the airport. Funny, isn't it? Napakalapit ko lang sa Manila pero hindi ako makita-kita ng mga kaibigan kong naghahanap sa akin. Mas effective ba kung mananatili ako sa malapit? Baka mamaya, kung kailan ako nangibang-bansa, saka naman nila akong mabilis na mahahanap. Tss, it wouldn't be ironic, would it?

“No, Cara, hindi ka aalis! Please, don't do it.”

“You can do that, you can stay here without getting a little closer to him. I'll do that for you, I won't let him get near to you. Just please, don't go, don't run from it, from him.”

“Of course, I will stop you. Paano 'yang bata? Palalakihin mo siya nang mag-isa? Tanga ka ba—”

“Agh! Stop haunting me with your words, Franchezca,” I muttered, puckering my lips as I wander around the airport.