Back to Me (Kenma x Reader)

new nights

--Your POV--

You didn't know if it was the whole soulmate thing, or if you actually felt a real connection with Kenma. You felt completely open to him; over the letters, you felt that you could talk to him about anything and everything and he wouldn't have any judgements about you. After the first few letters, it was like he already knew you by heart. Not really from what you wrote, but it was like he got that from something else. He knew exactly how you would act in certain situations, as if you had spent years with him. He knew the little things you liked, the things you didn't like, what caused a certain reaction from you- as if you had lived with him for years. 

Honestly, it was a bit creepy when you thought about it, but the whole thing with the dreams put a giant explanation in front of it. Every time you thought about the girl from the dreams, you realized that was exactly how you would act. You never really thought about it before; after all, you looked different and you were raised different. How could you be so alike? But when you thought about it, everything she did made 100% sense to you; it was like her way of thinking exactly matched yours. It was as if she were you. Or you were her- and honestly, thoughts like that were scary. 

"Humans are made of their memories." You had heard of that quote before, and you remembered it as you were thinking. If that's true, then that means I'm (y/n) from my dreams, but also (y/n) raised here. But that doesn't make any sense; how would I still have my memories? Surely just about nobody else retains their past life's memories- or perhaps it has to do with soulmates. This is really quite confusing-

"Lady (Y/N), the books you had ordered last week have arrived," Elisa informed you while you were thinking. You stopped your thoughts at the arrival of your books. Yes, you ordered books- not romance novels, but textbooks. Yes, textbooks. Your parents would never believe you. Anyone who knew you personally would definitely be surprised. 

The textbooks you ordered were on some of the most boring of subjects- national economics, persons management, history, social event organization, diplomacy, and etiquette. They were a level of interesting, until you were forced to study it. Since you were young, you had been forced to study the basics of these, as you were a queen's candidate. You've always wanted to learn things you were much more interested in, but you were forced to learn this nonetheless. After much convincing of your parents, they decided to let you decide what you wanted to do. But now, you were going to learn the things you decided you weren't going to learn. 

It seemed hypocritical; you always said that you were never interested in becoming queen, therefore just giving up on those studies to learn about (dream job),  but now you were going to study your mind off for the Queen's Trials. What changed your mind? Kenma. Now that you had a real connection with him, you didn't want to let him go. You wished her highness would let you win just because the High Priest said you were soulmates or Kenma had a sibling to take over for him, but that's just not how it worked. You had to earn your place and you were going to earn it. He was the one person who could truly understand you, and you really thought he was your soulmate now.

You knew you were definitely at a disadvantage; everyone had been steadily studying for years on these and getting real experience, and you obviously didn't have time now. The tests were in just a few months, and you were going to cram all of that. Well, you could do it in high school and college, what's so different now? 

You basically cancelled all your plans and locked yourself in your room to study. That was all you were going to do and it took up all of your time. Of course, your parents and Elisa were worried, but you just brushed them off. You could deal with them later; getting all of this down was more important. 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　

Your day went like this now: Wake up when the sun rises, quickly eat a couple slices of bread for breakfast, study in the morning, eat lunch for about half an hour, go back to studying, take a break around 3 if you needed, then study until dinner, then when you came back, you would study again till around 12. It was definitely rigorous, but at least you didn't pull all nighters. Well, if you fell behind, you figured it wouldn't hurt to pull a few, so that's what you decided you'd do. 

You weren't burning on determination all the time. Who could? So sometimes, there were times where you doodled on your paper or stared off into space for a good minute. Small pictures could often be found on your notes, and if asked about it, you would respond with an, "Oops." but not actually do anything about it, because you liked some of them. 

 ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

So, you studied that way for the last few months, and you saw great improvement. Of course, it shouldn't be on par with people who had learned all this over years, but it was at least something. It at least gave you a bit of confidence, which could be felt in the steps of your heels as they echoes through the halls of the royal palace, ready (or not) for the test. 

A/N: Hi, it's Lili once again! Literally no plot happened in this chapter, which is why it's so short oop- anyways this was kinda just setup for the next few chapters and I hope it wasn't boring! (I tried making it relatable-)