Under the Sky of Diamonds | ✔︎ (PUBLISHED UNDER PSICOM)

FOURTEEN

I GASPED when I saw Xydrien, causing him to snap his head at me but when my eyes met his, I felt different.

Pakiramdam ko nagsitaasan lahat ng balahibo ko sa katawan dahil sa klase ng tingin niya. His eyes were darker than the usual.

Gone the soft Xydrien. It is now a predator looking at its prey. 'Yong mga mata niya matalas ang tingin, I almost didn't recognize him. Para bang handa na siyang sakmalin ako sa klase ng tingin niya. Parang papatay siya sa klase ng tingin niya.

Akmang lalapit na ako sa kaniya pero mukhang dahil sa pagtatangka kong lumapit, nagalit siya.

"What the fuck are you doing here?!" he shouted and it echoed in the whole room.

I flinched because of the power of his voice. I tried to answer him but I couldn't find my voice. Nanunuyo ang lalamunan ko habang nakatingin sa kalagayan niya ngayon. Hindi ako nakapagsalita at nanatili lamang na nakatingin sa kaniya. I wanted to touch him, to feel his skin on my fingertips but I was afraid.

What happened? Why is he here? Why is he chained? Ano bang nangyayari?

"Xydrien," I called out his name.

He glared at me. "Leave this place! I don't need you here!" he shouted once again.

Huminga ako nang malalim bago naglakas loob na lapitan siya. I tried to smile at him before reaching but he immediately backed off a little. Mabilis na nawala ang ngiti ko sa aking labi at naramdaman kong parang kinurot ang puso ko dahil sa ginawa niya.

"Go out! Go out! Leave me alone! Fucking leave me alone! Umalis ka!" he angrily shouted.

Kinagat ko ang pang-ibaba kong labi at hindi na nagtangka pang lumapit. Nakaramdam ako ng isang hindi maipaliwanag na bigat at sakit sa aking puso dahil sa kaniyang sinabi.

"Xydrien, why are you pushing me away?"

"Because I don't need you!" sigaw niya.

"Xydrien . . ."

"Don't," he warned.

Akmang magsasalita na ako noong narinig ko ang pag-ubo niya. Agad akong binalot ng takot noong naging nagsimula siyang umubo nang sunod-sunod. His cough was even dry.

Huminga ako nang malalim bago nagtangkang lapitan siya. Kahit na anong sigaw niya at pagtataboy niya sa akin, hindi ako nakinig. Noong makita niya ang paglalakad ko papalapit sa kaniya roon na siya nagwala. He tried to free himself from the chains but he failed.

"Leave me alone, Eirysia! Leave me alone! I don't need you! I don't fucking need you here! Leave me alone!" he commanded.

Hindi ako umimik at tumingin lang ako sa kabuuan niya. Agad akong nakaramdam ng awa sa lagay niya.

Is he hurt because of me? Again?

Kitang-kita ko ang pagbakat ng maliliit na ugat sa kaniyang leeg at sa kaniyang sentido habang puno ng galit na nakatingin sa akin. Nanuyo ang lalamunan ko at nakaramdam ako pagsidhi ng kirot sa aking dibdib.

Why am I feeling like this? I'm lost and confused.

"Xydrien, please . . ." I called his name softly and it almost caught him off guard.

I saw his eyes soften when I called his name. I tried to step towards him when I thought that he's already calm but then he growled at me again. Louder than the first one.

"Stop! Leave! Fucking leave, Eirysia! Leave!"

Halos mabingi ako sa sigaw niyang iyon. I looked at his eyes and it's burning. Hindi na siya tulad ng dati. Gone the sweetness and the tenderness. All I can see rigid fire and it somehow scares me.