Constellations Of The Mind

I Can't Control It

I'm popping pills to forget the guilt,

Drinking all the sorrow away,

Screaming until the pain bounces off the walls,

Crying because of the anger and lack of self control,

Feeling nothing when they call me crazy,

Slamming my fist into the wall,

Smiling when I see bruises on my skin,

Thrashing about for no sensible reason,

Laughing when something terrible happens,

Frowning because someone else's dream came true.

Yeah, I've gone insane.

I hate it,

But I can't control it.