Memories Of Old [DSMP]

Sticks and Stones

•Description: After exiling Tommy, Tubbo finally grieves.

•Date Of Publication: December 8th, 2020

•Words: 600 words

•CW's: Heavy Angst, Hurt Not Comfort and Panic Attacks

•Extra Notes: A fic of what I thought c!Tubbo's thoughts and feelings were

[ × ]

New L'Manburg was quiet.

Too quiet.

The young president sat on top of the obsidian wall near the docks, watching the sun set. Dream promised to remove the walls tomorrow morning, so they had to tolerate this walls for another twelve hours.

Tubbo was fine with it. After all, they would be removed. His nation will continue to prosper in peace, with no wars.

Didn't mean in hurt any less what he did so they could reach this.

- - - - -

''So what's your decision?''

''I...''

- - - - -

No clouds were blocking the sun today. Huh, that's rare. Tubbo thought, feeling the slight breeze hit his face. He closed his eyes, feeling calmed for a moment.

He ordered the citizen's of New L'Manburg to stay inside their homes for the rest of the day until tomorrow morning, just in case Dream did something. Those whose homes weren't finished where staying at Fundy's and Quackity's houses, since they had the biggest houses.

Quackity suggested they should put someone to guard, just in case, and at first Ranboo volunteered, but Tubbo said he'd do it. He needed some time alone to think. Ranboo looked at him and nodded curtly, no emotion in his bi-colored eyes.

So now he was sat in the west of the walls with an almost broken diamond axe, staring at the sunset. He was finally alone, he could finally think about everything that has happened since the 16th.

A sob ripped through his body.

- - - - -

''Tubbo! I'm your best friend, you can't seriously consider this!"

"Tubbo, I'm waiting... The fate of your nation relies on you.''

- - - - -

Tears rolled down his face as whimpers and sobs were heard. Tubbo struggled to breath since he was taking short and fast breaths. His head felt light-headed and his chest hurt.

He really did it.

He exiled his best friend.

But it was the best for his nation, the other's didn't understand that their nation could not take another war. They were still rebuilding and flourishing, if they went straight into battle they would be risking their already fragile country.

And their fragile leaders.

- - - - -

''Shut the fuck up you green bastard- Tubbo, man, you're my best friend! You can't seriously consider this!"

"He already did."

- - - - -

Tubbo wasn't stupid- he knew that they would die fighting Dream. And it would've been fine if it wasn't for the fact that Tommy was in his last life, and Fundy and Quackity were on their second lives. If the three of them died, two would be left with one life.

And another would be gone. Forever.

Realistically, Tubbo knew he did the best he could for his country, he took the best decision there was and saved his nation from another war.

But it didn't make the pain of loosing his best friend dull.

- - - - -

"*laughs* It's... It's pretty funny... Tommy- I'm so sorry."

"W... W-What?"

- - - - -

The brunette gasped, feeling how his lungs ached. He needed to breath, he would pass out if he didn't. He started  hyperventilating, his fists tightening on his presidential suit.

It was hot, too hot. And his suit was suffocating him. The scratchy material rubbed against his skin, feeling luke a rash. The brunette struggled with the buttons, before removing his suit jacket and folding the sleeves of his white shirt up to his elbows.

He finally took a deep breath, staring at the sunset. It was beautiful, the oranges and yellows mixing well together while the clouds were a gorgeous light pink colour. The sky looked like it came from a painting.

If only he could listen to a music disc with his best friend one last time.