Bittersweet Love

The London Institute

May 17, 1877; London Train Station

I stepped out of the train and into the brisk morning air. The smell of smoke and ambition filled my lungs. I looked around the area, taking in my surroundings. The station was flooded with people hurrying along with their lives. A sudden wave of uncertainty flowed through me. I felt a small tap on my shoulder, I quickly turned to find a handsome young man awkwardly smiling at me.
"Hello. You must be Clara Branwell. Am I correct?" He said. I could tell he was nervous and poorly tried to hide it.
"I am she." I smiled. He smiled back at me.
"Splendid. Charlotte said to look for a red hair women. You stood out to me." He stood there awkwardly for a second before reaching for my luggage "I'll be taking you back to the Institute." He carried my luggage and led me to a carriage. He place my stuff in the back of the carriage before opening my door and helping me in. I let out a big sigh once the door had shut. It was stressful coming across the ocean by yourself. I looked out my window as we pasted dozens of faces and shops. I couldn't help but think of my beloved home, New York  City. 
I felt a pang if homesickness. I have always loved New York, my home. I lived on my father's estate and spent most of my days reading in the family library. I often felt alone in the mansion. Being the youngest with most of your siblings out of the house and into the real world, often times you had to entertain yourself. But London was much different than New York, the aura of the place felt peace and calm at times. And the people had wonderful accents. It always amused me to listen to a British person talk. I had such a bland accents, most Americans do.

We reached a large gate, it slowly creaked open, and I realized we have arrived. It snapped me out of my thoughts. I began to felt a sense of nervousness as we arrived. We halted to a stop. The young man walked around to open my door and held my hand to help me down. I could see my aunt Charlotte standing walking downtown the steps of the Institute and towards me.
"Good morning Clara! It so great to see you!" She pulled me in for a hug. It was somewhat awkward since I have never met this women in my life. I smiled through my own pain.
"Thank you so much for inviting me to stay!" I replied. She pulled away from the hug and led me inside.

We were sitting in the parlor sipping tea and making light conversation. Charlotte asked about my life at home. I asked about life in the Institute. I met the lovely house maid, Sophie. I was compelled to ask about the large scare that stretched across her face, but I decided to keep the question to myself.
"So Charlotte, is it just you and Henry living here?" I asked, carrying the conversation.
"Oh no. Will Herondale and James Carstairs live here as well as Ms. Jessamine Lovelace. And it turns out they seem to be around your age as well." She stated. I nodded slightly. It was a relief I wasn't going to be stuck here with two adults more than half my age. Charlotte smiled at me. I politely returned the smile. Sophie came in to announce lunch was ready.
"It appears Master Will and Master James are out for the day and will not be accompanying you for lunch Mrs. Branwell. But if you like, I'll go fetch Ms. Lovelace." Sophie stated.
"That would be lovely. And if she refuses at first, tell her we have a quest."
"I will." Sophie slightly bowed before walking out. Charlotte led me to the dining room and motioned me to sit. Their dining room was gorgeous. There was a beautiful chandelier hanging up in the middle of the ceiling. I stared up I awe as I sat in my chair closest to Charlotte. She sat at the end of the table. I found it odd. The man of the family always sat at the end. Charlotte quickly looked down at her hands, which were folded neatly in her lap.
"Henry will not be joining us." She stated rather bluntly. She quickly looked up to meet my eyes. I could tell there was a flashed of annoyance and disappointment when she looked at me.
I slight nodded. "I see." Was all I said.
"I'm sure you're eager to meet your uncle. As it being the first time you have met him."
My curiosity got the best of me "Why isn't he joining us? May I ask?"
Charlotte sighed "My husband is a brilliant man. He works in his laboratory day and night. One day..." she paused looking to the side "One day he'll do something great for the Shadowhunter society." She said doubtful when she said it. It was obvious Charlotte was doubtful of her husband. The door opened and Sophie and a young women walked in. The young women came and sat across from me. Her gazed finally reached me, she looked at me for a few seconds, taking in all my features.
"Hello. You must be ClaryBranwell. I've heard so little about you." She smiled.
"It's actually Clara. And it's a pleasure to meet you. I take it you're Jessamine."
You looked at me with a bit of annoyance plastered on her face before quickly turning it into a smile. "Yes. When Charlotte told me there was going to be another girl around here, I was over the moon." She said through a plastered smile.
"Yes Jessamine. It's very lovely that Clara is finally here with us. It's not like you had me all these years." Charlotte said the ending rather bitterly. Jessamine hide a eye roll.

We spent our lunch chatting, as we lady's do. After lunch Jessamine offered to give me a tour. She showed me the study, the library. Although I will admit, the library at the Institute isn't as beautiful as the one at home. It still brought me tons of joy to see all the books. Lastly, Jessamine showed me to my room. I quickly thanked her for the tour and walked inside my room. It was simple. Nothing too extreme. It have a bed, a small fire place. In the back of the room had an other room with a bath. It had a beautiful vanity. My luggage was already in my room, so I decided to unpack.

After I unpacked, I took a small trip to the library. I explored all the possible books I could read. I found a book all about demons-although it would bore most people, I liked to further my knowledge on such things- and decided to take it back to my room. Once I was back in my own room, I was called for dinner.

I walked into the dining room, it appeared everyone was already there. Everyone was staring at me when I walked in. Charlotte sat at the end of the table once again. Jessamine sat next to a very young man with gray hair. I presumed the older man with the faded red hair at the other end of the table-opposite of Charlotte- was my uncle Henry. There was one empty seat, next to a desk headed young man. I slide in to that seat.
Charlotte smiled at me. "Well now since we're all here, I would like to introduce Ms. Clara Branwell." She said. I awkwardly waved to everyone. "This is James Carstairs." Charlotte motioned to the boy with the gray hair. I found it odd that such a young man with such young features, could have gray hair. I quickly decided not to ask.
"It's a pleasure to meet you James." I said to him. He smiled.
"No. The pleasure is mine. And please, call me Jem."
"Ok Jem." I replied smiling at him.
Charlotte quickly chimed in, "The boy to your left is Will Herondale."
I turned to face Will, he did to. I met eyes with his gorgeous icy blue eyes.
"It's very nice to meet you too Will." I said forcing myself to smile.
"It's very lovely to meet you Clara." He said. He's wasn't smiling though. He turned away from me to make conversation with Jem. Henry introduced himself and apologized for his absence at lunch.

The dinner went on. We had vegetable soup. Henry bored everyone with his new inventions. I smiled the entire time he was explaining. He held constant eye contact. In the middle of dinner, Jem turned to me.
"So Clara, tell us about your home in New York. How is America like?" He asked. He seemed genuinely curious.
"New York is a lovely place, if you like busy towns and obnoxious people everywhere."
"We can get that right here in London." Will comment. I decided to ignore it.
"I live in a very lovely home. Although it's just me and my mom most of the time. All of my siblings live elsewhere. But things have been rather quiet after my father died." There was a dead silence. The only sound was the clunk of everyone's spoons hitting their bowls.
Henry spoke up, "I'm so sorry. We had no idea about your father. I can't imagine what an utter lost that was."
"Thank you. My mother thought best not to tell anyone."
"How is your mother dealing with all this?" Charlotte asked. They really didn't know.
"She's ... fine. She'd thought it would be best to send me away so I could heal." There was an awkward silence after that. The rest of dinner was awkward conversation and silence. I decided I couldn't take enough.
"I'm heading off to bed. I'm very tried." I quickly blurted out.
"I understand. You had a very long day. You must rest." Charlotte said.
I arose from my chair, Will did as well.
"If you want, I'll escort you to your room. I would hate for you to get lost." Will said to me. I was oddly stunned by this action. As seeing he made no effort to make conversation over dinner. I thought it would be for the best for him to escort me, I lost my way to the dining room on the way to dinner.
"That would be lovely. Thank you." I said quickly. He led me out of the dining room and into the hallway.