WOLF SONGS

CHAPTER 12: The Road to Recovery

(*sigh* this chapter is gonna play with my emotions....I just know it...Mari if you read this, can me and kai have a fucking hug 😔)

After what had happened, Kai was more anxious and would jump at any little sound or sudden movement. Even yoichi sometimes reached out too quickly, ending up scaring kai and making his omega cower in fear....and yoichi hated it.

He hated seeing kai so nervous and scared, when really he was the strongest person yoichi knew.
The bruises on his arms and legs were more visible now, reminding yoichi of how close he came to losing his omega, and how much kai fought to stay with him.

In addition to kai's anxiety was an instinct to cling to yoichi....if yoichi left him for more than ten minutes the omega would cry, then when yoichi returned kai would latch onto him for long periods of time.

Yoichi soon discovered that petting kai had the best effect, because it often put him to sleep, calmed him down, or brought soft whines of content.

Yoichi didn't speak much to the others either. He knew it wasnt their fault, but still.... Yoichi felt rage and aggression, unfortunately they were the closest targets. So he thought it was better not to talk to them for a while until his alpha wolf calmed down

Kai fell asleep on yoichis bed, cuddling yuki, the only one he'd go near besides yoichi. 

Eventually when he woke up he had to participate, scoutmaster Yuri walked up to Kai. none of the scoutmasters knew what happened, in order to tell them they'd have to reveal that kai was a werewolf....and right now that was the last thing they needed.

"Kai, would you be a sweetheart and get me a box of art supplies from the shed?" Yuri asked.

Kai paled, "th-the sh-shed?" He stammered

Yuri saw Kai's look of fear "are you okay sweetie? Its okay to be scared of the dark or of small spaces, you don't have to-..."

"N-no.....I'll do it, I should stop letting my fear get the best of me"

And so, here kai was, in front of the shed, his hand hovering over the handle..... Come on kai, yoichi is doing his best to help you, so just face your fear already ... Easier said than done
In his mind, kai yelled at his omega to open the door and complete the simple task.

But his omega made his body freeze up, remembering that a few days ago, this shed was his worst nightmare....

You can do it kai, he's globe, he can't hurt you

...

...

He already did

Kai shook off the unwelcome thought and opened the door slowly, as he searched for the supplies he felt a chill up his spine. He glanced over at the desk, the memory of his assault clear in his mind.... He noticed a few scratches from his own hands on the old faded wood.

Kai suddenly felt very angry, he should have fought harder, he should have done something besides cry and cower.
You're just an omega, omegas can't fight, they just obey like good little mates

"Shut up"

You deny me because I'm right, omegas are made to be obedient

Kai growled at his own omega "I'm tired of being obedient, I'm aired of being weak and fragile" kai said aloud.
Anyone who'd witnessed would have believed that kai was talking to himself,
But really, he was talking to the wolf.

Like it or not  you can't fight an alpha

"..."
At this kai stayed silent, because it was true, this was the first prime he'd ever tried to stand up to an alpha wolf, and look what it gave him. Trauma, emotional and physical strain, and fear.
Kai felt the tears escape as all the events came flooding back.

He hated it. Hated the alpha that caused it, hated himself for being so weak and vulnerable, but most of all, he hated that he couldn't even give his mate the love he wanted to give because trauma and his own fear stood in the way. He didn't want to lose yoichi, he didn't want to be vulnerable.

Kai sunk down and pulled his knees towards his chest

He remembered yoichi and him as kids, it was a fond memory.

(Flashback!)
"Kai! I heard you singing before!"

Kai jumped at the sudden outburst, "y-you did?"

Yoichi nodded, an exited smile on his face, "its really good!"

"Well I kinda just sing to vent and stuff"kai said nervously.

"Awwww I guess I understand, so sing what you feel more often, then I can know whenever you're feeling good or not!"

Kai laughed, drawing pictures in the dirt with a stick, "whatever you say yoichi"

(End flashback)

Kai took a deep breath, taking yoichi's advice, and singing to alleviate the stress and fear

He felt as if the room brightened, like whatever traces of the past were fading, leaving only the stillness and the sound of his own voice in the air.

It didn't mean he had recovered, he still had a long way to go, but it was a start. A start along the road to recovery.
Yoichi stood outside the shed smiling at the sound of his omegas voice, he wanted to go and see what took him so long, but after seeing the shed he realized what the problem was and worried that kai was either crying, having a panic attack, or both.

But hearing him sing those words made yoichi realize that kai was stronger than even HE had thought.
He walked in and hugged a very confused but calm omega.
"I'm proud of you" he said softly, kai smiled band hugged back. It was a simple phrase, but it meant a lot that yoichi could be proud of him despite what had happened to him.

"Thank you" he said.

(Well, kai has finally started to allow his healing process to begin, so let's all root for him.... Bye pups and have a lovely day/night...ciao!)