Annalise Writes

Chapter 13

After we returned home, my mind cleared up even more from the psychedelic effects of Lord M's sucky-sucky session, and a terrifyingly sobering thought sank in.

With only $167 in my bank account and a soul-crushing pile of bills weighing over my head, I was now in charge of feeding, housing, and taking care of one full grown man and one bloodthirsty vamp.

I glanced over to Jaxon and Lord Maxwell. "Yo, you guys need to get jobs."

Lord M's eyebrows rose with interest. "My clever mistress of the written word, are you suggesting for Jaxon and I to enter... the labor force?"

I nodded and grimaced. "Yes, otherwise, I can't afford to keep you."

Lord Maxwell's face broke into a wide, fanged grin. "What a most splendid idea, my love! I have always desired to secure a livelihood that might fulfill the aching, barren depths of my eternal existence and unleash my full potential for all of society to admire and revere..."

Jaxon coughed. "It's not that deep, bro. I think Annalise just wants us to chip in with the rent."

Lord Maxwell appeared slightly miffed. "Is that so?"

I confirmed Jax's statement, "Yep."

Lord Maxwell's expression dimmed. Jaxon snickered.

"Anyway," I continued, "I wanna go shower real quick and maybe do some laundry. I have blood stains everywhere. Ugh, so gross."

Without any warning, Jaxon started stripping down to his black boxer briefs.

I gasped. "Whoa, buddy! What are you doing?"

He smiled sheepishly at me. "I got blood all over my clothes, too. Would you mind throwing my shit into the machine with your clothes?"

Lord Maxwell turned to Jaxon with a question in his eyes. "I am curious to know, Jaxon—what is this mysterious machine that you speak of?"

In baffled tones, Jaxon asked, "Damn, what century are you from again?"

That was a good question. I wracked my brain for the answer.

Was A Loveless Blood Moon Eclipse set during the Victorian era?

Maybe Medieval times?

Or did it take place during the Renaissance period?

Honestly, it was all a jumble in my mind at this point.

Uh-oh.

Would Lord M have any applicable skills to secure a job in today's market?

Did he even know how to type on a keyboard?

Shit.

As though the vampire had picked up on my vibes just then, his brow creased in a troubled manner.

"Oh, dear. Your inquiry leaves me feeling slightly befuddled, my good fellow. To be perfectly transparent with you, I do not know when I rose from the ashes of mortal life into my rebirth as a creature of the night. Perhaps I ought to study the history of my ancestry—

Jaxon held up his hand to stop Lord M from diving into another ten minute monologue.

"Okay, that's super interesting and all, but, uh... long story short... people have invented laundry machines to wash dirty clothes now, okay? Welcome to the future, man."

Understanding dawned on Lord M's pale, handsome face.

Immediately, he whipped around to face me with imploring eyes. "My sweet Annalise, I fear there might be a few pesky spots on my shirt and trousers as well. If it would not be too much of an inconvenience, do you suppose you could launder them in that magical machine of yours?"

Without waiting for me to respond, the vampire began slithering out of his shirt and trousers with the practiced ease of Channing Tatum in Magic Mike until he, too, stood before me in nothing but his undergarments.

My eyes darted dazedly between the two gorgeous, nearly naked males in my living room.

Good lord! Abs, abs, and more abs!

These two absolutely resembled every single Hottpad romance cover model with their muscled pecs and rock hard six packs.

My cheeks pinkened as I tried not to drool over at Jaxon's solidly chiseled, tatted up body and Lord M's marble-like, statuesque perfection.

"Uh, um, ah... yeah... sure!"

They offered me their clothes.

I snatched up the garments like a flustered squirrel accepting nuts for the winter. Then, I took a deep breath and made a valiant attempt to calm down my lady bits.

Jaxon said, "Thanks, Annalise!"

Lord M chirped, "I am forever indebted to your kindness, my love!"

"Uh... you're welcome," I mumbled. "But you guys need to start doing your own laundry after we get you some more clothes..."

This brought me back full circle m to the sorry state of my current finances: Clothes cost money.

I turned to Jaxon, who was, shockingly enough, proving to be the more reliable and level-headed one out of the two.

"Hey, Jax? Do you think you could teach Lord Maxwell how to use Google? Maybe you guys can scroll through some job listings while I'm washing up..."

"Sure."

I tossed my phone to him. With ease, he caught it in one hand.

Lord Maxwell peered over Jaxon's shoulder to study my phone.

His face broke into a delighted grin. "Ooh! Ahh! What might this tiny rectangular contraption be?"

"It's a phone," Jaxon explained in the clipped tones of a tired parent talking to an overly inquisitive toddler.

"I thought Annalise called it a 'google' mere moments ago," Lord M challenged indignantly.

Jaxon groaned, "Oh, boy. This is going to take a while to explain..."

With a chuckle, I escaped into the bathroom with my arms full of bloodied shirts and trousers—and left Jaxon to deal with Lord M on his own.