21 year old Alex is a unique person.
His pronouns are he/him, but sometimes he was just flat out confused.
Overall, he'd decided that he/him fit him best, despite the fact that his biggest secret lies underneath his clothes and inside his bedroom.
...
I woke up with a huge sense of excitement. It was 10:30 AM and Jack was sound asleep next to me, laying on his back with one hand on his chest, the other at his side. I got on top of him, straddling him. I bounced a little. "Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack." I grinned at him while bouncing. He opened his eyes and made a face at me, then closed them again, "Lexxxxx." He complained. "Jaaaaaaack" I mocked. He glared at me, "Too early." I rolled my eyes "It's 10:30, you promised we'd go get my nails done and yours too, and I wanna go! Let's get ready!" I bounced on him again. I got to do that now that he's my boyfriend. I decided that. This morning. About three minutes ago. He grabbed my hips to stop me, threw me off onto my back and laid on top of me, squishing me. I kicked and pushed at him, "Get off me!" "Nope!" He laughed and lifted up just enough to kiss me. I pressed my lips tight and glared. "Ohhh. Don't pout." I kept my glare. "Fine, fine. I'll get up, but when I do I want a good morning kiss. Morning breath and all." He smirked. I nodded, "Deal." He got off of me and sat up on the bed. I sat up, leaned in and kissed him, "Good morning." I got up and skipped my happy ass to the bathroom to get ready. I got dressed in all black today, black jeans, black Glamour Kills shirt, black Vans. The only thing that wasn't black was my grey Glamour Kills beanie. I brushed my teeth, washed my face, then fixed my bangs that poked out from under the beanie. I watched as Jack got dressed in his typical black outfit. Black jeans, a black shirt with a red pocket on it, a black hoodie and his black converse. I smiled at him as he brushed his teeth, "All black everything always, it's hot." I smirked. I felt a lot more comfortable saying things like that so boldly now that I knew that he wanted to be with me in the same way that I did with him. He smirked, spit and rinsed, then started working on his hair, "Colors aren't any fun."
We left the hotel room hand in hand and stopped at Taco Bell, of course, to get their breakfast burritos. I ate quickly, Jack took his time, which annoyed the hell out of me because all I wanted to do was get there and do my god damn nails. I bounced in my seat, "Jaaaack hurry up jesus christ." I whined. Jack smirked and finished the last few bites, "Jesus christ, calm down. The nail salon is still going to be there in five minutes." He shook his head but looked completely amused by me. I rolled my eyes and watched him finish his drink. When he was done, we finally got back in the car and went to the nail salon. I sat in the passenger seat staring at it. "Well...Are we going to go in?" Jack asked, putting his hand on my thigh. "I uh....I don't know." I said nervously, looking at him. It was hitting me now. I was about to do something that I hadn't done in a long, long time. Show my femme side to the world. "Alex...It's going to be perfectly fine. You're going to go in there, you're going to pick some really cute color, and you're going to be so, so happy when you're done. I'll be there the whole time. Like I said, I'll even get mine done too." He smiled and squeezed my thigh a little. I nodded and took a deep breath, "Okay." I got out of the car and waited for him. He got out, took my hand and opened the door for me. I walked in with my head down, feeling like I was about to throw up.
"Hi" A woman with pretty blonde hair, hair that I could only dream of, smiled at us "What can I do for you guys today?" I looked at all they had to offer. They did waxing too. I needed that. My legs and arms weren't happy with me and my face and eyebrows needed help. I considered. I'd gotten everything waxed before. I mean EVERYTHING. Why not now? "I uh...I w-want to get a w-wax...an-" I swallowed hard, "And a man-manicure..."I looked at Jack. "He wants to get some acrylics." He smiled. The woman smiled back, "Okay, we can definitely do that. Let's do the wax first. What are we doing?" I blushed, "Everything?" She must've known how nervous I was because she kept her voice calm and kind, "Okay, have you been waxed before?" I nodded timidly. Jack squeezed my hand. "Okay, so let's go do that first. Do you want a wax too?" She looked at Jack. Jack put his hands up a little, "Nope. That's for him." He chuckled a little, "I'll wait right here til you're done babe." He sat down in one of the seats, probably the same seats that all of the bored husbands sat in. I just nodded and followed the nice lady to the back, looking at all of their board certifications on the wall.
The wax was as expected. Painful, but worth it. Most painful in the areas you'd most expect, but god I loved how I looked. Finally. I was starting to feel like me again. Smooth, totally clean of any hair I didn't want, and about to get pretty. At least a little. I came back out and smiled at Jack, who stood up again and walked over to me. "Are you going to do anything too?" She asked him. Jack nodded, "Yep. Just paint them." He smiled. I smiled back, "You don't have to" I whispered. "You're scared to have yours done out in public, I'll do mine too. That way we can do it together." He kissed my cheek. "Okay. I'll do the acrylics first. Sit down sweetie." She handed me a little book of photos of the designs she could do. I picked out a soft pink with glittered tips. I bit my lip, looking at Jack. I felt like I was going to throw up. "Honey it's okay," She smiled at me, "My son gets his done too." I tilted my head a little, "Really?" She nodded and pulled her phone out, showing me a picture of her son. He looked to be about 15, and he was wearing a low cut shirt that I'd seen in the women's department of Macy's. He had a full face of makeup on, reminding me of James Charles a bit, skinny jeans and high heels. She zoomed in on the nails. He had black acrylics. Longer than I'd be getting today. "His name is Mason." She said proudly. I smiled, "That's incredible." I felt more confident now. If he could do it, and if she was totally accepting of it, then so could I. "Okay. Lets do it." I said contently. Jack smiled proudly at me, got his phone out and started browsing twitter while she worked magic on my fingers.
After she was done, I swear to god I had tears in my eyes. "Oh my god." I was mesmerized. "How do you like them sweetie?" She asked happily. "They're perfect! Thank you so so so so much!" I squealed. Yep. Squealed. She laughed, while Jack just looked at me like I walked on water. "Alright, what for you?" She asked Jack. I looked at the name on one of her certificates behind her station. Kiera. Jack shrugged, "What should I get Lex?" Lex. Lexy. Babe. I wouldn't be getting over those for a while. "Get whatever you want." I smiled, "Whatever color you like." Jack tilted his head a little, "Well. Big ravens fan. How about black and purple?" He smiled at Kiera. "Ooo, do you want a design? I could do black with gold and purple stripes up horizontally" Kiera suggested. I bounced a little, "That would be so cool! Do it Jack!" I grinned. Jack laughed, "Alright cool, yeah go for it." He stuck his hands over at her station and let her do her thing. Once she was done, she took pictures of our nails and took us up to the counter. I paid for mine and Jack's, since he was doing this out of complete solidarity. I left her a god damn good tip and made my way out, staring at my pretty nails with a grin on my face. I was on a roll now. "Can we go to your house? I wanna get one of my outfits." I looked at Jack. Jack raised an eyebrow, then nodded "Yeah of course we can. Do you know what box it's in?" I nodded, "I do! Let's go let's go!" I was like a fucking kid on Christmas day.
I was so excited on the drive to Jack's. He opened the garage once we got there and watched with a smile on his face as I ran to the box I was looking for. I pulled out the beanie, top, skirt and underwear I wanted, then in another box I grabbed the shoes I wanted. I had this outfit packed perfectly. I'd packed my favorites that I was tempted to break out for tumblr. The rest were more scattered but I had about five boxes with just specific outfits. Then I looked through a box for my makeup, grinning when I found my bag. "Be right back." I let myself in through the garage door that lead into the house. I went into the downstairs bathroom, changed, fixed my hair the way I wanted it with the beanie and worked on my makeup. Pink eyeshadow look, light eyeliner with fake lashes, soft pink tinted gloss. I grinned at myself. I hadn't felt this good in a while. I felt beautiful. Someone other than an internet stranger was making me feel that way. I swapped out my shoes, checked myself over one last time. I picked up my old clothes and shoes and walked back out into the garage, doing a little twirl for Jack. His eyes were wide. "Oh...My god." I smiled a tiny bit, "Good oh my god or bad oh my god?" I walked over to the car, putting my old clothes and my makeup bag in the back. I'd at least wear makeup again. This outfit had me feeling confident though. It matched my nails perfectly. "Good oh my god, of course. Come here." He leaned against the hood of his car.
I walked over to him, smiling when he put his hands on my hips, pulling me in close to him. I felt butterflies in my stomach. I was standing outside, on the driveway where anyone could see me, but all that mattered was this guy who made me feel beautiful. Jack reached up with one hand and cupped my face, leaning in and pressing a kiss to my glossed lips. He licked his lips after, "Watermelon?" He smirked. I nodded, "It's my favorite." I grinned. "You're my favorite. You look so beautiful." He kissed me again. I was on top of the fucking world. "You mean it?" My hands were on his chest, his hands back on my hips. "I mean it with all that I've got." "I'm hungry." I sighed, "Feed me." "We can get something if you want?" He offered. I looked down at my outfit, "Can we drive through?" I was nervous again. "We can do whatever you want. Personally, I think you'd make anyone in any restaurant we go to look like complete peasants with how great you look. I get it though." He shrugged. He was so cool with just about everything. I never thought anyone would act the way he does. He just seems like he wants me to be myself. Hopefully that's the truth. It seems like it. "Let's just drive through for now. It's going to be weird enough walking through the hotel lobby in a pink skirt and crop top." I frowned. I hadn't thought of that. "You'll be okay, I'll cover you while we walk in if you want." He smiled at me before getting in the driver's seat. I got into the passenger seat and looked over at him. He put his hand on my bare thigh, the warmth felt good.
We wound up driving through Jack in the Box, as much as I didn't want fast food. I was too much of a coward to go inside anywhere with this outfit on, but I wanted to so, so badly. I didn't make Jack cover me as we walked through the hotel lobby, and I earned myself a lot of stares. "Skirts are for women!" Some fucker said as he covered his kid's eyes. I bit my lip and walked faster. "Ew..." A woman mumbled as she walked past me, looking me up and down. Jack kept his arm around my waist and walked with me, now trying to cover me up. "You're going to hell for dressing like that and acting how you do. You should be ashamed of yourself." A man stopped to tell us. "Yeah well you're going to hell for being a judgmental prick. Matthew - Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. Or how about this one? Matthew - Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." The man stared at Jack, and so did I. Where did that come from? "That's right you hypocritical fuck. I grew up going to church. I can recite so many fucking bible verses that it'll make your damn head spin. So shut the fuck up and let your god do the judging. My god believes that everyone was made unique in their own way, my god believes that the scriptures written in any form of book about him is the furthest thing from the truth. Because if it was, if god truly believed that, and if god truly was in control of the entire universe as the bible so claims, and that he makes everyone in his image but didn't believe in who we are, then people like he and I wouldn't exist at all. I don't want to hear about satan either because I can quote his bible as well, and I can promise you right now that it's a hell of a lot kinder to people than your shitty bible is. So tell me, who are the real bad guys here? Who's really deserving of hell? Because I can sure as shit promise it's not us. So go fuck yourself." He snapped, his voice like venom. It was hot. He wrapped his arm tighter around me and kissed my temple, "You're so fucking beautiful." He whispered in my ear.
I smiled just a tiny bit and walked with him to my room, glancing back at the man who was still standing there looking shocked. "Are you okay?" Jack asked me quietly. I nodded, "Yeah...A little sick to my stomach...I got scared. I didn't know you were religious." I got into the elevator with him and hit the button for my floor, ignoring the looks from the woman behind me. She was dressed in a tacky, blue colored pantsuit. She didn't get to judge me. She can talk when she's wearing over $1700 worth of clothes on her. I didn't buy any Walmart shit. When I got my clothes, I got the best ones. She could go fuck herself. I looked at my nails, holding them in front of me dramatically, tilting my head at them, sort of like Vivian did in Legally Blonde when she's showing off her ring. "Jack look how pretty they are. I'm still not over it." I gushed. I heard her scoff. "Your ass looks even better in that skirt, and the nails? Can't wait for them to be dragging down my back." He whispered, smirking at me. She walked out on the second floor, shaking her head and mumbling things.
I laughed, "Oh my god." I shook my head, totally amused. Maybe being out dressed like this wasn't so bad. It would probably be worse outside that hotel lobby though. We got out of the elevator and to my room. I unlocked it and walked in, "So that was fun." I sat down on my bed and took the food bag from Jack, "get me a beer out of the fridge please. You can have one too, if you want. I mean what? Your birthday is June 18th, and it's April 6th? You'll be 21 soon. So." I shrugged. He smiled and grabbed two bottles of Shock Top. It wasn't my favorite, but it was what the hotel brought me when I called and asked for booze. I also had tequila, whiskey and vodka too, just a few mini bottles of each, but still. My thought process was that if I'm going to be here, I'd have a good time with it. I dug out my chicken nuggets, took my beer and popped it open and took a large drink. Jack smirked, "Okay, that's really fucking hot. You in this tight mini skirt, a crop top, these amazing high heels, pink everything, and you're sitting here drinking a beer and eating fucking chicken nuggets. You're going to be the death of me, I swear to god." He might as well have been drooling. I dipped my chicken nugget in the bbq sauce, bringing it up slowly to my mouth, biting into it as sexy as I could, "Mmm...So good." Like I was doing a porn style mukbang. "Do not tease me. You know I will act on it." He shook his head, chugging about half his beer in one go, taking a bite of his spicy chicken sandwich. I bit my lip a little, "Maybe I want you to act on it." He raised an eyebrow at me, "Oh do you?" Fuck eating. He pushed his food away, putting it on the table. I grinned and put mine on the table too, pounding back the rest of my beer.
Jack pounded his back, took our bottles and put them on the floor. I laid down against the pillows, an innocent little smirk on my face. He didn't know about the panties. "Come here babe" I bit my bottom lip all sexy, reaching my hand down just under the hem of my skirt. Jack looked at me like I walked on water. I didn't exactly see what he did, but god damn I love that he saw it at all. He crawled over to me on all fours, hovering over me as he leaned down and pressed a hard kiss to my lips that I eagerly returned, my arms around his neck. I pulled back after a minute, "I'm not having sex with you...But you should see what's under my skirt..." I walked my fingers up my thigh, sliding my skirt up as he watched. I made a show of sliding the skirt up slowly, finally revealing those pink lace panties. His eyes went wide, "holy shit" He breathed out. I let out a giggle. Yes. A giggle. "Alexander..." He looked at me, shaking his head. "You won't have sex with me but you give me this gift?" He pouted. "I didn't say we couldn't have any fun at all..." I winked at him. He grinned, it had been two weeks since we'd really done anything, and for us, that was kind of unheard of since we hooked up first thing and couldn't seem to stay away from each other, despite the fact that we'd only had sex three times. We wanted to. The fact that I held out for two weeks and he wasn't like every other guy who would bitch about it was incredible to me. I'd give him sex soon. Except I would top. I haven't yet, and I want to. Maybe I'll even top in a dress. That would be fun.
He shook his head at me, "You're too fucking much." "So...What are you going to do about it? I mean....Wouldn't these look so much better on the floor?" I slipped my finger in the waistband of the panties, the skirt slid all the way up, leaving everything exposed. "I think the skirt would too...And the top...The beanie...The shoes can stay" He pulled the skirt back down and undid every single button, since all that closed it was buttons up the front. He tossed it to the floor, then undid the straps of my top and unzipped it, throwing that to the floor to join my skirt. Jack sat on my knees, one leg in between mine. He leaned down and kissed my lips, biting my bottom one before kissing down my jaw and neck, biting and sucking on all of the spots he'd discovered. Just below my jaw, above my collarbones, the center of my chest, under my nipples. "Mmm...Jack..." I bit my lip. He smirked and stopped for a moment, taking his shirt off. Good fucking god he's so beautiful. Am I really not going to have sex with him? Maybe I'm going to have sex with him.
Jack undid his pants and kicked those off, leaving himself in just those skin tight boxer briefs of his. I couldn't help but stare at him. "Like what you see?" I nodded, "Yeah...I do...Get back here..." He took his previous position and kissed down my chest again, stopping just below my belly button. He kissed straight down where my happy trail would be if I allowed myself to ever have one. Not likely. I felt myself getting harder and harder, the panties restricting me. I needed out. He seemed to get that. He took the waistband of the panties between his teeth and pulled them down that way, the only assistance from me was lifting my ass just enough for him to pull them down. He pulled them all the way down, staring at me as he pulled them off over my shoes. He looked at my erection and smirked, "That's more like it." He slid his underwear off, "What are we going to do about this?" He asked, looking down at me. I pouted, "I don't know, why don't you tell me? Don't tease me." "Don't pout." He scooted down, took my cock in his hand and started getting me off slowly. I needed more. "Jack...More" I whined. "More what?" He knew exactly what he was doing and I knew it. "God damn it Jack" I groaned, huffing a little as he stroked me faster. "Tell me what you want baby." I glared, "I want to top next time. That's what I want." Jack laughed, "You can top whenever you want baby boy, but it seems right now like you're the one who wants to be fucked." I grabbed him by the arm and pulled him up so we were face to face, "I want you to fuck me so hard that I think I'm having a fucking heart attack by the time we're done." I was going to get what I didn't even know I wanted until now. "But I thought you weren't having sex with me." "Yeah well I didn't think that I was, but look at me now, begging for you to fuck me so hard that I think I'm dying. So are you going to be fucking me or do I need you to go back to your house, get in my box and get my toys? Because both will do the job."
Jack shook his head at me, looking absolutely amused. "Where's the lube?" This was so casual. I pointed to the drawer on the table. He opened it up, grabbed the lube and set it down next to us. I stared at it. "Why the hell aren't you doing anything with it. I'm naked, in high heels, I have acrylic nails and full face makeup, and you're acting like none of this phases you." I glared. "Be patient." He moved down so that his face was next to my cock but he did what I wasn't expecting. He spread my thighs apart, got down all the way in between my legs and licked my entrance. I shivered a little and arched my back "Oh...Oh..." I gripped the bedsheets. He kept my legs apart as he swirled his tongue around, making me moan out his name. This felt so fucking good. He pulled up, grabbed the lube and coated his fingers in it. "Ready?" "Get the fuck inside of me so I can ride you like a fucking whore." I panted, already so turned on just by the fucking rimjob alone. "So no prep for you?" I shook my head, aching to just finger myself because he was being a tease, all because I was going back on saying I wouldn't have sex with him. I watched as he put lube on the rock hard erection I hadn't even paid attention to until now. I was too busy focusing on my own needs. So he just liked teasing me and hearing me bitch about it. He lifted my legs around his waist, centered himself and pushed himself in slowly. I winced a little at the pain, but wanted more. I pushed my ass against him more. He pushed himself in further. "Now" I moaned, ready to fucking go. He pushed himself all the way in and started thrusting against me. "Oh fuck....Yes...Fuck..." I moaned, gripping the sheets. I missed sex. Two weeks without it after hooking up with him three times? Didn't fly with me. He was too good in bed. Now he's officially mine, too. It needed to be celebrated.
"Alex...Fuck...I missed this" He let out quietly. "I missed you" I arched my back, letting out quiet, smooth moans. Then he hit my sweet spot perfectly, and sweet little moans were out of the question. "Roll over." Jack smirked and rolled over onto his back. I adjusted myself on him, put my hands on his shoulders and pulled him up so that we were chest to chest. I wrapped my arms around his neck and moved my hips against him. He gripped my ass and pushed me exactly where he wanted me to go, his face buried in my neck, letting out muffled moans as I gripped his hair. My moans were anything but quiet, "Jack....Mmm....Fuck...Yes...." Followed by loud moans that would make a pornstar look bad. It wasn't wild and crazy like I'd initially wanted. This was so much better. It was loud, yes. It was intimate though, not just sex because we were both horny. That may be what started it, but this was something else entirely. Jack nipped and sucked my neck while I moved against him, muffling his moans that got louder and louder, as mine grew more desperate. "Touch me" I begged. He reached his hand down in between us and started stroking, sliding his thumb across my slit, making me moan even louder. He thrust into me faster and faster, jerking me off sloppily but I loved it, as I crashed my hips against his. He came first, and his moan when he did sent me flying. I came all over his hand and his chest a bit with another moan that would put a pornstar out of business.
I wrapped my arms around his neck, our foreheads pressed together. I lifted myself just enough so that he wasn't inside of me anymore before sitting back down. He wrapped his arms around my waist and held me close to him, not caring that we were covered in our mess at the moment. "I missed you." I whispered. He smiled, "I missed you too." My desperate self wanted to tell him I loved him so badly, but how could I? I should've learned from last time. I knew better, but still, my brain betrayed me and screamed at me to tell him. I wouldn't though. I refused. Coward. It's too soon. He might not even love you back. How could he? It's only been close to a month. How could you love him then? I just do. Better tell him before he runs away. He wouldn't. He might. Stop. Tell him. No. Say it. "I think I kinda love you..." Fuck. Jack smiled, "I think I kind of love you too." He wasn't taking it seriously, thank god. I could tell. "You don't think that's weird?" I asked, biting my lip as I looked at him. He shook his head, "Nope. I'm not saying I'm in love with you. It's way too soon for that. We're just getting started, but I do care about you. I tell friends that I love them, do you not?" I shrugged, "Yeah...I do." "So then, what's the issue? Maybe, hopefully, not so far from now we'll be saying that we're in love." He kissed me. I kissed back, "I didn't freak you out?" He shook his head again, "Not one bit." I nodded, "Okay."
"Alex, can I ask you something?" He rubbed my back, I laid my forehead against his shoulder. "Yeah." I answered quietly. "Why are you so worried about my reaction? I mean to everything?" His question was sweet, and I knew he meant well with it. Still. It made me nervous to answer. "I don't know...I guess I need approval. You heard about my ex. He didn't approve of anything unless it benefitted him, and I didn't even realize it...My parents are dead...My brother is dead....My uncle hates me...My only other friend doesn't know anything about me apart from what I show at work...I have no one to prove myself to...No one to make proud...I have no one to look up to...I mean, if my brother and parents were here, would they like me still? I just...I need someone to actually care...Someone to truly be proud of me, not embarrassed by me...I mean I'm all alone. I feel like a star that hasn't been accounted for in the universe, or a lost satellite that's long been forgotten...No one's out here paying attention to me anymore. They don't care. So now that I have you...I guess I'm just constantly seeking your approval...I don't want to scare you away." I sighed. Jack traced circles against my skin with his finger. "You're not scaring me away. I am proud of you, look at what you accomplished recently. You stopped taking shit from your uncle, you did something for yourself with getting your nails done, which by the way felt great when you dragged them down my back, keep the acrylics, and you didn't let it freak you out too much when you dressed the way that you wanted to and walked through the lobby in it. Not even when people were being assholes about it. That's a lot to be proud of, Alex. I think your parents and brother would be proud of you too." He kissed my shoulder.
I lifted my head from his to look at him, "You're too good for me." I sighed. "I don't think I'm good enough." "Why do you think that?" "You think you're all alone? Alex look at me. My mom is gone, my dad is in prison for god only knows how long, and my brother and sister are too busy for me to care, and if they do, they have a shitty way of showing it. I'm alone and angry all the time, Lex. You make me happy though. I forget about the things that scare me." He ran one hand through my hair, the other stayed on my back. "What are you scared of?" My hands rested on the back of his neck. "Everything. Losing everyone completely. Truly being alone. Terrified of my dad coming back. I can't deal with him Alex. I can't. He scares me. My brother and sister don't really answer when I call...I've already lost them...What's so wrong with me that they don't want to be around me? My mom couldn't even stay for me." He looked sad now. "Nothing is wrong with you baby." I whispered, hugging him close to me. We were alone in so many different ways, and somehow our loneliness brought us together. He helped me feel accepted, to feel valid, cared about. He eased my fears. I helped him feel loved, not abandoned by everyone. I helped him feel like someone in the world wanted him. We were the same in so many ways, yet so different. The two balanced each other out well. I'm good for him, he's good for me. "Don't leave okay? If this doesn't work out...If we don't work out...Promise you won't leave me alone?" He asked, looking up at me with desperate eyes. "I promise. Don't you ever leave me either." I leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. "I want you Jack. Don't forget what I'm telling you. I want you." Jack nodded, "And I'm proud of you. I want you too." I kissed him again.
Alex's first look:
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Second look:
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.