I see my life as lives.
I still remember the little girl,
Who loved skirts-
And rainbow loom.
Who loved gymnastics-
And wanted to go to the Olympics.
No one knows that girl.
I still remember when I started going through changes-
Fourth grade I think it was.
When I became too scared to tumble anymore-
Breaking my arm broke my spirit.
When I had to find ways to find other ways to turn my life upside down.
When I started acting-
Singing.
When I felt insecure about my abilities.
Ones I had never doubted before.
That girl who was a leader-
Who started fundraisers,
Who became controlling because no one would listen to her.
Who became someone she didn't like looking at in the mirror.
Who started seeing her flaws.
The girl who started discovering sarcasm-
The girl who was a goody-two-shoes,
And all she knew was her faith.
Does my family still see that girl?
The life where I didn't care what anyone thought of me.
The life where I was trying to be someone I wasn't.
The life where I felt pressured to like things I just couldn't understand.
The life where I wanted to be a musical prodigy-
The life where I discovered theatre all over again and fell in love.
The life where I never wanted to be sad-
The life of anemia-
The life of survivor's guilt-
The life of anxiety-
The life of remembering my bully-
But those lives are inside me.
Does anyone know it?
Or do they see it separately?
When I leave this life-
This place I am now-
No one but me-
Will see my life is not a life-
But lives.
And no one will see those lives.
No one will see that I'm tangled up in the roads of all the places I've been-
No one will come to find me.
I can't find me.
YOU ARE READING
My Letters to the World
PoetryEmotions. We all have them even though sometimes we may want to get rid of them. We've all been confused by them, maybe some more than others. Or maybe we're just confused all the time. This is my story. The story of a girl just trying to get throu...
