Later. || Jikook

27. Twenty Seven

"Don't turn your back to me!" Jungkook shouted, raising his arms and letting them fall again by his sides.

"And you don't scream at me!" Lisa shouted back, walking out of their bedroom.

"Well don't make me! How about that!"

Lisa turned and stopped him from following her. She held a hand ahead of herself making him halt, and looked at him right in the eyes.

"Honestly Jungkook I'm tired" she said, lowering her tone but keeping the same exhausted expression on her face.

"Do you think I'm not? Do you think I'm enjoying this?" Jungkook asked, digging the tips of his fingers in his chest "I'm out here looking like an entire fool trying to save the little bit left of what we had, while you're out there throwing yourself at the first guy who smiles at you!" Jungkook pointed out, his heart clenching at his own words. His eyes were glassy, his hair disheveled from running his hand through it, his jaws gritted.

"That's not fair" she knit her eyebrows.

"You think?"

"It's unfair for me! I was trying to be friendly, I was never cheating on you like you cheated on me!" she brought up the topic again which seemed to be almost a scapegoat for her now.

"I was fucking drunk Lisa! I realized and apologized! I regretted it and never let anything like that happen again! What else could I have done to make you realize it was a mistake?" he said yet again, completely over that argument.

"It still happened"

"Will you stop using that as an excuse at last?" he chuckled humourlessly.

"So now you're undervaluing my insecurities?"

"Oh please, not the victim act. I did kiss a stranger that night but then, I thought about it and- I saw you that night, because I wanted to see you! I wanted it to be you who smiled at me and pulled me in like that... I missed how we used to be and all the fighting buried those memories deeper everytime, what happened to you loving me?" he let all his frustrations out and felt his heart beat faster in his chest.

"Did I have to tell you everytime?" she asked as it if was the most absurd thing ever.

"Yes! I didn't see it, I didn't feel it, I didn't think it... You haven't let me touch you for weeks now, whenever we interact we end up arguing, we sleep at each side of the bed...To be honest with you, I don't believe you did, so tell me if I'm wrong, do you love me like I love you Lisa?" he asked, his eyes wide and hopeful, watching her every reaction and change in her eyes. Feeling his heart break at every second she took to answer.

"I'm... so sorry Jungkook" she finally spoke and watched his expression turn into a straight one, losing all depth and emotion.

"You really don't" he breathed out.

"I guess I fell out of love at some point, I don't know myself" she admitted, feeling nervous from Jungkook's blank face. "I didn't mean to hurt you I promise" she tried, hesitating to take any step closer to him at that moment. "I was also frustrated by how it didn't feel the same with you anymore, but you were always trying to make it better and failing" she added.

Jungkook had sat on the couch while she was standing a few feet away from him. The tension in the room could be sliced with a knife and it was suffocating to Lisa, she felt so bad for causing so much ache to her boyfriend. She knew he deserved way better than that but it was all too late now.

"Say something Kook"

"Truthfully, I think I said enough" he spoke, his voice a lot quieter, its true sound coming out and the words getting hard to hear.