Wake Me Up Inside, Bring Me Back to Life. (Frerard Fanfiction)

Chapter 20~

Gerard's POV

I've been sitting here, alone and I'm still locked the fuck in this room. There's more blood stains, everywhere you turn. I guess you could say I bleed a lot, well I'm being beaten and harming myself so it is expected to bleed. I looked over to a random sound, nothing was there or in this house though. Malik's at school, I hear it again and look down to see all of my scars bleeding again. But I feel no pain, I blink and it's gone.

It's official that I'm losing my mind, turning into a Schitzo wasn't on my agenda. But it only makes everything a whole lot worse, why can't I just go take my razor blade and go try to kill myself again? Malik won't be home for 4 hours, noone is looking for me, so why not?

It's all because you're a coward Gerard. I want that voice out of my head, it won't shut up. It makes me just want to fucking jump of a cliff even more, considering I would if only I could get out. I don't know what exactly I'm going to do when I get out. Considering the Schizophrenia is temporary and I stay in a sweater I'd be fine, no. No I wouldn't, I'd still have these thoughts, I'd still have a terrible self image, I'd still have these scars, I'd still have a razor blade, and an addiction that wouldn't go away.

So even if I get out I won't be fine, even if I seem fine to Frankie, Ray, or Mikey. If I never get out I will get the same outcome and that's depressing, digging a hole so deep you can't get back up to the light anymore. Like in a deep never ending dark tunnel and once you hit the dead end, you're gone.

I wish someone could care enough to come find me, I wish Frankie would care enough to come find me. I mean i fucking loved his ass, why isn't he here? Does he not really love me? I guess so and it's fucked up to me. All of this is fucked up to me, considering I'm kidnapped by my ex- abusive boyfriend, my boyfriend won't come find me, I'm all alone, I'm covered in scars, and developing Schizophrenia. So life I would love to thank you for being so terrible to me.

5 hours later~

Fuck, I'm so sore and fucking weak. I'm bleeding again, now I'm shaking to. I'm such a baby to the pain and I really wish I had higher pain tolerance. Maybe I wouldn't even be here if I did. I heard a bang and jumped, Malik mouthed, "What he fuck." and went to go see what was going on. "Where the fuck is he?!" I heard someone yell, oh hey maybe someone actually gave a shit to come find me, oh wait no, noone cares.

I saw someone walk into the room, I couldn't tell if it was Malik or someone else and I really stopped caring. I felt dizzy, my vision was blurring, and I didn't know why but I wanted to black out.  They wrapped their arms around me and picked me up, walking through the living room I caught a glance of malik bleeding on the floor. What the fuck.

I blacked out, I open my eyes to see Frankie's room. Not Malik's or Malik's bathroom, I'm wearing an Emmure sweater. I look over to see Frankie with tears streaming down his face, I automatically get up and hug him tightly. "I love you so much." I whimper and cry into his shoulder, it was true. I did love him, with every piece of me. Nothing could ever make me not love him and the fact he saved me makes it better.

I don't know exactly how I feel about being in love with someone so badly, but it makes me happy, really happy. Even though I'm going to fall, I know he is going to help me up somehow and that's comforting. "I love you to Gee." he whispers into my ear and kisses me gently.